


Transition

by rockinhamburger



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-22
Updated: 2015-06-22
Packaged: 2018-04-05 13:26:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 24,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4181514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rockinhamburger/pseuds/rockinhamburger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a universe where Kurt and Blaine have a very different meet-cute - or more accurately, a meet-not-so-cute, it seems fate is determined to put them in each other's path over and over again. A tale of destiny - or coincidence - and relational progression. Written for the KBL 2015 Reversebang</p>
            </blockquote>





	Transition

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is my contribution to the KurtBlaine Reversebang, for which I was paired with artist [kurtsieangel](http://kurtsieangel.tumblr.com), whose art was the inspiration. Editing was provided by [glycerineclown](http://glycerineclown.tumblr.com) who helped make this a more cohesive story.
> 
> _Transition:_  
>  1\. movement, passage, or change from one position, state, stage, subject, concept, etc., to another.  
> 2\. Music.  
> a) passing from one key to another; modulation.  
> b) a brief modulation; a modulation used in passing.  
> c) a sudden, unprepared modulation.

Blaine Anderson is never getting married. Watching his parents’ marriage and its slow descent into shambles has rather soured the institution and tradition for him. He’s been preparing for his parents’ divorce for the better part of his life but that’s not the reason for his new resolution.

No, it’s seeing his father sharing intimate coffee at the Lima Bean with a woman that can’t be more than ten years older than Blaine.

That he wasn’t prepared for.

Blaine knows his parents were happily married at one point, certainly before Blaine was born, when Cooper was little. But as long as Blaine’s been able to walk and talk his parents’ marriage has been riddled with arguments, distrust, and either miscommunication or the lack of any communication at all.

Cooper moved out long before he had to, just a few months after his 16th birthday. It was only when Blaine was in his preteens that he realized that was unusual and began to wonder about his brother’s motivations. While they were out for a walk to escape the steely ice between their parents one Christmas break, Cooper answered Blaine’s question about it.

“Same reason we’re out walking in sub-zero temperatures right now. The fighting and the resentment just got to be too much.”

“I don’t get it,” Blaine said. “I know it’s depressing but wouldn’t it have been better to stick out those last couple of years? All those hours you worked, all that money you could have saved for college instead of the apartment?”

Cooper smiled grimly. “Well, you never saw the happy times, squirt.”

It was one of Cooper’s rare somber moments.

Blaine knows better than to blame himself; he does know that his parents are incredibly dysfunctional people, and that has little to do with Blaine himself. He has moments of weakness, though, like when he’s just on the cusp of sleep and he’s jerked awake by the mere idea that his birth was the spark their marriage needed to begin its implosion.

It doesn’t help that their relationship has become a great deal more volatile since he was hospitalized in his last year of middle school at Lima West. Blaine suspects it’s because he started at Dalton the following year and since then he hasn’t been home as much to be the buffer between them. And while he’s been glad to be free of that burden somewhat, the freedom has come with immense guilt as well.

So, divorce hasn’t been something to dread for Blaine; if anything, Blaine’s been waiting for them to just get it over with already.

An affair, though. That one stings.

Blaine keeps what he’s seen to himself, cannot begin to imagine how his mother will react to the information. Instead, he decides he’s going to scope out the situation by spending a lot more time at the Lima Bean in the hopes of catching his father in the act so he’ll have to own up to it. He doesn’t see his father again but he keeps at it, just in case.

He’s never getting married.

~*~

Blaine’s been promoted to lead soloist for the Warblers this year. It’s a prestigious honor, one that Blaine does not take lightly.

His first year at Dalton had been interesting, to say the least. He’d had some trouble fitting in initially, often speaking his mind in a way that seemed to result in foot-in-mouth-disease, and hastily stammered apologies.

But his Sectionals solo had resulted in, according to Wes, the Warblers’ advancement to Regionals for the first time in four years, and they therefore wanted Blaine to sing _every_ solo.

He is looking forward to bringing his ideas to the council for musical numbers and choreography that might just send them to Nationals.

-

The coffee currently soaking through Blaine’s uniform shirt is incredibly hot. Blaine yelps and whirls around to find the person – the culprit – who’d knocked into him and made him spill his coffee.

The culprit is standing with his back to Blaine, talking and laughing with a girl he’s seen at the Lima Bean a few times – they talked once when he complimented her outfit. The culprit is himself wearing quite the outfit, a transparent raincoat over a knee-length sweater and very tight skinny jeans.

The boy’s saying, “So then Mom says—”

“Excuse me?” Blaine snaps to get his attention, and okay maybe he says it sort of rudely but the guy hasn’t even noticed what he did. “You made me spill my coffee? It’s considered polite to apologize when you knock into someone.”

The culprit turns and gives him a _look_ – one raised eyebrow and an expression of disdain. “Is it considered polite to rudely confront someone who obviously accidentally bumped into you?” the boy retorts.

Blaine finds himself flushing from embarrassment, and that makes him even more frustrated. “I’m just saying, maybe pay more attention to your surroundings in the future.”

The boy scoffs. “Maybe you should take your own advice, buddy.” And with a mocking head nod he turns to his friend, the girl Blaine’s seen around, and says, “Let’s go, Mercedes. Some people have no manners.”

They leave together, the girl – Mercedes, apparently – looking back over her shoulder at Blaine with a look that appears conflicted.

He doesn’t even know that jerk’s name.

But it only takes a bit of work once he gets home to find the guy on Facebook. He just looks up Mercedes and goes through her friends list until he finds him.

Kurt Hummel.

According to Facebook, he is a sophomore at William McKinley High. He is sixteen, and his birthday is in May. Most of his posts are fashion related.

Interestingly, his father is a Congressman who ran as an independent two years ago and won – Blaine realizes he's seen him on television. Blaine looks Congressman Hummel up on YouTube and finds a video entitled ‘Bullying: Confronting the Toxicity in Our Children’s Schools.’ Blaine watches it and finds himself agreeing with every point the man makes about policy changes and the environment schools can provide by creating a zero-tolerance policy for bullying and violence.

Blaine thinks about how things might have gone at Lima West if the school had implemented a zero-tolerance policy on bullying before or at least after he was put in the hospital by prominent members of the football team because they didn’t like his choice of date.

He also finds a video of Kurt Hummel delivering a speech for an organization called The Freechild Project, which is defined in the description as an organization that promotes political engagement from young people. He scrolls back up and is about to watch it when he hears a shout echoing from his parents’ room.

He listens in, despite how little he wants to hear. His mother is doing the shouting this time, and it’s shrill and uncontrolled in a manner that is usually reserved for serious fights. He closes his laptop.

“Who the hell is she!?”

Blaine freezes in the act of closing his bedroom window so the neighbours are less likely to hear.

“Pamela, if you don’t lower your voice then Blaine will hear everything!” his father shouts, and Blaine takes a moment to appreciate the irony.

“Do you know how stupid I felt when Teresa told me? I had to pretend I already knew! This is the last straw, John! I can’t even look at you right now!”

Blaine hears his mother’s footsteps pounding down the hall and hears the bang of the door to the guest bedroom.

Blaine waits to see if the fight will pick back up again but he hears nothing for the next few minutes so he grabs his phone off his bedside table and creeps downstairs to take a walk. It’s as he’s passing the park around the corner that he makes the call.

“Hey squirt!”

“Don’t, please,” Blaine says, exhausted.

“What’s up?” Cooper asks, and he sounds genuinely concerned. “You sound terrible.”

“Um, I – I think Mom and Dad are… I think they might actually split up this time.”

Cooper scoffs. “Doubtful,” he says, but his tone softens immediately. “They never have before, Blaine. And we both know there’ve been plenty of good reasons to.”

Blaine swallows thickly. “Dad’s cheating.”

“… _Fuck_.”

Fuck sums it up perfectly.

Now Cooper’s in agreement with Blaine.

But the following morning when Blaine gets up for school, his parents are acting like nothing happened. They’re not speaking to each other at the table over breakfast; his father’s reading the paper and his mother is scrolling on her phone but that’s normal behaviour for them. It’s obvious there’s tension but there’s no sign that divorce plans are imminent, either.

Blaine is torn between disappointment and relief. They always manage to get Blaine’s hopes up that they’re finally going to deal with their unhappiness, and then nothing changes and Blaine finds himself stupidly reverting back to childhood Blaine, genuinely happy his parents are still together.

But he’s got Sectionals to focus on, and that will help to take his mind off things for now.

Two days later, Blaine sees an interloper during an impromptu performance in the seniors’ lounge.

Blaine recognizes him immediately, even though he’s wearing a passable attempt at the Dalton uniform in order to blend in. He doesn’t miss a step (Blaine never misses a step), keeps an eye on Hummel as he twirls and performs, singing their Katy Perry number and staying in step with his fellow Warblers. It’s a good number – they’ve worked hard on it, and they might as well give him something good to spy on.

Blaine finds Hummel afterward, David and Wes at his side. “Spying?” he demands. “I figured you New Directioners had more class than that.”

Hummel shrugs nonchalantly. “Just checking out the competition. Not altogether concerned – you all need some work for sure.”

Wes gasps. “How dare you! You come into our school - _our school_ \- and you insult us?”

“Wes, it’s all right,” Blaine says, patting his arm. “Let’s save our passion for Sectionals when we wipe the floor with them.” Wes and David reluctantly retreat, heading back to join the Warblers for practice, and Blaine watches them before he turns to his rival. “I hope you won’t be stealing any of our material, Hummel. We don’t approve of intimidation tactics but if you want to get nasty, we can go there, too.”

Hummel raises an eyebrow – that damned eyebrow! “Sounds dirty.” Blaine’s ears burn. “Why don’t you do like you told your showmates and save it for Sectionals?” 

He turns on his heel and marches out of the student lounge.

Blaine curses himself for letting Hummel have the exit again.

He assumes the situation is over until he arrives at school the following morning and a gigantic sign has been hung over their rehearsal room that reads: 

**Dalton Garglers**

“This means war!” Blaine declares when the Warblers have gathered for an emergency meeting.

Cheers ring out through the room, and they begin to plan their counter-attack.

“How’d you do it?”

Blaine looks up from his coffee and sheet music, delighted when he sees Hummel standing in front of him, hip cocked to the side and arms crossed over his chest. He’s wearing a blue Marc Jacobs coat zipped over a cream-colored turtleneck and a pair of very tight black jeans.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Blaine says airily, adopting an innocent expression.

“Oh, please, Anderson. Toilet papering the choir room? Been done. Find something more original next time.”

“You should probably lock that window into your choir room from now on,” Blaine says with a smirk. “Did you like the sign?”

Hummel snorts. “Oh, like that pun’s never been made with our name before. Try harder next time.”

And he slinks away, achieving yet another triumphant exit. “Damn it!” he says, and cringes in apology when the elderly couple at the next table mutters their disapproval.

He’ll just have to get the exit at the next available opportunity.

The following afternoon, the Warblers find their cars egged when they get out of rehearsal. In retaliation, they drive out to McKinley the next day to slash the New Directions’ tires. They’re waiting when Hummel and his choirmates flood into the parking lot from the school.

“Good one, Hummel,” he calls to them. “But those eggs just gave us an excuse to bring our cars to the cleaners. They needed a rinse anyway.”

“‘Cause yours cars are dirty?” Hummel shoots back. “Sounds very embarrassing for you.” Blaine opens his mouth to retaliate but can’t think of a single comeback, feels his ears burning again from embarrassment. “And anyway,” Kurt continues, “my parents own a tire shop so you literally could not have picked a more pointless prank. Better luck next time.”

Blaine wordlessly watches the New Directions congregate further down the parking lot, huddled in a circle and clearly planning, Hummel off to the side on his phone.

“What’s next, Blaine?” Jeff asks from beside him.

“It’s their move but we’ll be ready for it,” Blaine remarks, and he motions for them to head back to their cars and to Westerville for rehearsal. “We’ll come back again with a brilliant prank that will go down in history as the very best show choir prank ever performed. We are the Warblers, we’re Dalton men. We—”

He gasps as a cup full of slushie is splashed directly into his face. When he looks up, wiping syrup from his eyes, he sees in front of him the guy responsible; he’s holding a Big Gulp cup in his hand and wearing a letterman jacket and a mohawk and a broad grin.

“See ya at Sectionals, Garglers!” he laughs, and he high-fives the guys who are with him as they saunter off.

When they convene in the junior lounge, the other Warblers think they should retaliate. Blaine has been thinking about the prank war on the drive over, and he tells them his conclusion.

“Warblers, Sectionals is in two weeks. We should be preparing, not retaliating. They have shown us what kind of performers they are – more interested in pranks and dirty tactics than preparing for the competition,” he says in a booming voice, beginning one hell of a monologue. “They’ve been trying to distract us so we’re off our game but not anymore. We ignore them from here on out. We are above silly pranks. We have class! We are going to focus on bringing our best performance to the competition because anything else is a waste of our time and energy.”

They’re obviously disappointed but they agree to it. Blaine reminds them of their honour when they find out about the Tator Tots stuffed into their tailpipes the next day. “We will not stoop to their level!” he reminds them.

Their lack of response seems to put an end to the pranking. Per Blaine’s instructions, they focus on the competition, fine-tuning their vocals and dance routines.

At Sectionals, Blaine sees Hummel sitting at a table across from Rachel Berry. He debates about whether to approach for several moments before he heads over with the purest of intentions.

“Hummel,” he nods. “Just wanted to wish you luck.”

“We don’t need luck,” Hummel states, and then adds a hasty, “but thank you. And… good luck to you, too. I’m glad that whole pranking business ended when it did. I… might have gotten a little carried away.”

“Yeah, maybe. Your slushie certainly sent a message,” Blaine grumbles, still sore about that one.

Hummel gives him a look of confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“Oh don’t play dumb, Hummel. The slushie facial? That kid with the Mohawk that you sicced on me?”

“Puckerman!” Hummel growls, looking around wildly. After a moment of apparently no luck, he turns to Blaine. “Listen, I’m sorry. That was never part of the plan but Puckerman frequently acts of his own volition wherever he sees fit. I would never resort to slushies. They’re not my style. There aren’t even any machines in the school.”

“It’s true,” Rachel Berry says.

Blaine narrows his eyes, considering the legitimacy of their claim.

Hummel holds his hands up. “Principal Sylvester banned them from the school last year, and the rumor is you get a piping hot enema if you’re caught with a slushie on the campus.” Hummel appears to be genuine. He tacks on, with a smile, “And enemas aren’t my thing.”

Blaine tries to keep a straight face but he doesn’t quite manage it. He clears his throat and gives Kurt and Rachel a brief nod, and says, “May the best team win today.”

And he finally makes his triumphant exit.

They tie with New Directions. Sure, a win would have been even better but Blaine hugs his choirmates with genuine excitement that they will be going on to the next round.

He finds Hummel backstage. “Good work out there,” he says honestly.

Hummel looks surprised despite their earlier conversation but he holds out his hand, and they shake on it. “You too,” he says. “See you at Regionals.”

-

Cooper comes home for Christmas.

The two of them switch off being the referee during Christmas dinner, asking questions and trying to get a semblance of a normal conversation going but it’s not long before things take a nose dive, with their mother saying in response to Cooper’s question about work, “Oh, that’s such a boring subject for me. Your father has much more entertaining stories about work.”

“On Christmas, Pamela? Really?” their father snaps.

Their mother shrugs. “Is that a fraught subject, John? Now why would it be?” 

Their father gets up from the table. “I’m not doing this,” he spits out.

“Maybe you should have said that to _her_ ,” she mutters as she’s taking a sip of her wine, and that’s the comment that sends their father storming from the room.

Blaine and Cooper step out for their customary holiday walk once their mother has excused herself from the table.

“That’s the worst I’ve ever seen them,” Cooper says once they’re sitting in the swings at the park around the corner from the house, and after they’ve been quiet for some time. “God, I can’t believe he’s cheating.”

“I saw them at the Lima Bean one time,” Blaine says. Cooper looks over. “She’s, like, 20-something and works at Dad’s firm.”

“Whoa,” Cooper says, eyes wide. “Mom really went for his jugular back there, huh?”

Blaine hums in agreement and kicks off the ground to get the swing moving a little. There are several minutes of silence between and around them.

Christmas is always cold and silent.

Blaine sighs. “When the fuck is it going to end?”

“Oh, I’ll take ‘Never’ for 1000, Alex.”

Blaine laughs. “Come on,” he says, getting off the swing. “Let’s go make some hot cocoa.”

-

At Regionals, New Directions perform original songs – they look and sound amazing, and if Blaine’s honest with himself, the Warblers never stood a chance. Blaine can’t truly hold it against them for being the better choir.

That doesn’t stop Blaine from leaving the concert hall immediately after the pronouncement, and a brief comforting huddle with his choirmates, and heading straight to his car so he doesn’t have to face Kurt Hummel and the New Directions. He’d rather experience the full extent of the disappointment he already feels in himself without witnesses.

His parents are arguing when Blaine gets home, as they have been every night for months. He’s become accustomed to it but is not remotely in the right headspace to deal with it right now, so he turns on his heel and walks back into the night to wait it out.

-

During the summer between his sophomore and junior year, his dad is rarely home. He spends weeks at a time out of town for work. Blaine finds himself splitting his time between his job at King’s Island and spending time with his mother so she doesn’t get too lonely.

It’s not a great summer. Not as bad as the time he broke his leg in third grade and spent the whole summer with a cast but it comes close. Blaine doesn’t have much hope of a better school year.

-

Then he meets Sebastian Smythe, and everything changes.

From the moment they meet, Blaine knows Sebastian is going to be important.

One minute they’re exchanging pleasantries and the next they’re making out in the janitor’s closet on the second floor. Blaine’s pretty sure there was some flirting thrown in there and a quick discussion about where they were going to do the making out, but it all happened so quickly, and now here he is being kissed like Sebastian’s running out of oxygen and is stealing some of Blaine’s.

He doesn’t mind at all. Kissing is amazing. Blaine had no idea.

Sebastian flirts a lot that first week, and it is very flattering. He tells Blaine he sings like a dream and looks like sex on a stick. Blaine has never experienced another boy describe him in such brazen terms. It’s intoxicating, and Sebastian is gorgeous so it’s even more of a surprise to Blaine that Sebastian is interested.

It doesn’t take long for their courtship to move beyond heated kissing. Blaine finds himself grinding desperately on Sebastian’s lap in the back of his car during a study period. The friction between them is exquisite; Blaine has never felt anything like it.

After, Sebastian suggests they check out West Lima’s only gay bar, Scandals. He finds a fake ID for Blaine that looks nothing like Blaine but the bouncer still lets them in. After a few drinks and some grinding on the dance floor, they’re in the backseat again but this time with their pants down around their ankles and their hands on each other’s dicks.

It’s indescribably pleasurable, and Blaine feels so special that Sebastian wants to experience this with him. It’s only when he’s at home in bed, listening to his parents arguing down the hall, that Blaine doesn’t feel quite so special. Whenever he’s imagined his first sexual experiences with another person, they definitely have not taken place in the backseat of a car. 

He finds Seb first thing in the morning in the student lounge.

“Can we talk?” he asks.

“Of course, champ!” Seb says cheerfully, and he grabs his coffee off the prep counter and follows Blaine to a quiet spot.

It takes him a few moments to work up the courage but finally he says, “I don’t really want to do… um, what we did last night… in a car again. Why don’t you come over to my house tonight? My parents will be out late…”

“That is a great idea, Blaine,” Sebastian says with a huge smile. 

That night, Sebastian sucks Blaine off. He is clearly very skilled at it as he is able to take Blaine very well. He even swallows Blaine’s come, and in that moment Blaine thinks it might actually be possible to die from pleasure.

He fumbles his way through his very first blowjob but Seb has his hands buried in Blaine’s hair and seems to be enjoying it. “God, Blaine, you’re really good at that,” he whimpers. “Such a beautiful mouth.”

Blaine groans around Seb, picks up the pace and tries to make him feel as good as possible. When Seb comes, Blaine’s embarrassed that he can’t swallow but Seb pulls him up and gives him a kiss with fervent tongue.

“That was so sexy, Blaine,” he gasps out.

Blaine clings to him, needs their closeness more than he can fully express.

_This_ is what Blaine always thought it would be like.

And then it gets all messed up.

Blaine and Seb are making grilled cheese sandwiches for lunch the following weekend. They’re both wearing pajama pants and undershirts, and Seb’s been coming over to Blaine by the stove periodically to suck a new hickey into Blaine’s exposed skin. It’s the most comfortable Blaine has ever felt; he’s happier than he’s maybe ever been.

And then his father walks into the kitchen, right as Seb is kissing his throat, arms wrapped around Blaine’s waist from behind. He clears his throat and Blaine drops the spatula and whirls around.

“Dad!” he says. “I—I thought you were in Boston this weekend.”

His father keeps his eyes fixed on Sebastian as he answers. “Conference was canceled. Who are you?” he asks Seb directly.

“This is my boyfriend, Sebastian,” Blaine says quickly so that Sebastian isn’t put on the spot. “He’s new at Dalton, just transferred a few weeks ago.”

His father approaches with his hand out. “John Anderson.”

“Sebastian Smythe, sir,” Seb says, shaking the hand firmly.

“Oh!” his father remarks. “Your father must be Richard; I’ve just recently met him. Good man.”

“Well, any man my father associates with has got to be good himself,” Sebastian says, quite smoothly in Blaine’s opinion. He feels a strong rush of affection for him, is tempted to go over and kiss him. He restrains himself.

“You’re welcome here any time, Sebastian,” Blaine’s dad says in a friendly sort of way. “Perhaps you could join us for dinner in the next couple of weeks so we could host you properly?”

“I’d love to join you,” Seb says politely.

“Excellent, I’ll confer with Blaine about dates soon. Blaine, may I speak with you, please?”

Blaine has transferred the sandwiches on to their plates and turned the burner off, so he mutters a quick “one sec” to Seb and follows his father out into the foyer and further along into the study.

His father closes the door. “Blaine, do you really think it’s… appropriate to bring your boyfriend over when you haven’t so much as introduced him to us, or asked if he can stay here? I’m going to assume he spent the night, and that is certainly something you need to get permission for.”

He hangs his head. “I’m sorry, Dad, I should have asked.”

“Yes, you should have. I don’t want him over here again until he’s had dinner with us, and you are certainly not allowed to have him over when we are not home.”

Blaine doesn’t argue. He considers himself lucky that he hasn’t been grounded and heads back into the kitchen.

Sebastian’s not there.

Blaine finds him in his bedroom getting dressed. Blaine gets momentarily distracted by the attractive sight. “Where are you going?” Blaine asks, sitting down on the edge of his bed and tugging Sebastian over to stand between the V of his legs. “My dad’s heading out, we can get in another round for sure—”

Seb interrupts him, “Why’d you tell him I’m your boyfriend?”

Blaine is floored. “Well, I—I just thought – I guess I assumed since we’ve been doing this for a few weeks now—”

“Yeah, you assumed,” Sebastian drawls. “I’m not your boyfriend, Blaine, and you’re not mine. We’re just messing around – I thought you knew that.”

“I’m not an idiot, Sebastian,” he says, standing up and moving across the room so he can put some physical and emotional distance between them and get his words out properly. “I know you’re not into relationships and you like casual, and that’s fine, but don’t pretend you’ve been acting like this is just sex. You might not want to admit it, but there’s more to us than that. But you know what, if that’s all you want, it’s better we end it now. I hope you find what you’re looking for.”

And with that, Blaine escapes into his bathroom and starts his shower so Sebastian won’t hear him crying.

His mom comes in that night, a couple hours after Blaine’s refusal of dinner. He’s been in his room all day. His mom lies down beside him, wraps Blaine up in her arms and kisses him along his forehead. “He’s not worth it, Blainey. If he can’t appreciate what a wonderful person you are, he is not worth your tears.”

Blaine appreciates the sentiment but he wishes she would take her own advice, considering he’s heard her crying over his father too many times to possibly count.

“We weren’t even really together, Mom. It doesn’t matter, I’m fine,” he says, but his hands are shaking.

That’s a lie if Blaine’s ever told one.

On Monday, Blaine is gloomily reaching for his coffee on the counter at the Lima Bean when he hears the Warblers begin to sing behind him.

Sebastian is flanked by their choirmates. He sings, backed by the Warblers’ vocals:

_Although I laugh and I act like a clown_  
_Beneath this mask I am wearing a frown_  
_And so it’s true pride comes before a fall_  
_I’m telling you so that you won’t lose all_  
_I’m a loser and I’ve lost someone who’s near to me_  
_I’m a loser and I’m not what I appear to be…_  


Sebastian approaches as they finish the song, and Blaine feels his heart forgiving him already.

“I’m so sorry, Blaine. Will you give me another chance?”

Blaine kisses him.

The Warblers, and many of the Lima Bean patrons, begin to applaud and cheer. As they pull apart, Blaine looks around and catches Kurt Hummel’s eye across the room, where he’s standing by the syrup counter. He gives Blaine a thumbs-up and a smile, and Blaine waves and smiles back.

“Who’s that?” Sebastian asks him, pulling Blaine close with an arm around his shoulder.

“Oh, that’s Kurt Hummel!” Blaine tells him, heart light from joy. “He’s with the New Directions. We had a rivalry last year but we called a truce.”

“How nice,” Sebastian says, smiling widely.

That same day, Kurt comes over to him where Blaine’s sitting at the Bean after school. “So that was pretty romantic this morning,” he says by way of greeting.

Blaine beams. “I’m really happy.”

“That’s great, Blaine!”

Blaine finally notices Kurt’s outfit – a light blue peacoat with black buttons over a pair of black skinny jeans, and a grey and black wraparound scarf across his throat. It’s an amazing outfit, and Blaine is so jealous that he’s stuck wearing this uniform every day.

“Have I ever told you that you always look like you’ve stepped out of a fashion magazine?” Blaine asks. “How do you get all these original pieces? They must be so expensive.”

Kurt gestures to the table like he’s asking for permission to sit; Blaine beckons to him quickly, and Kurt pulls his phone out as he sits down. “It’s actually very affordable! I’m a fiend for sales and thrift shopping and really, really good knock-offs. Here, I’ve got spreadsheets.”

Blaine eagerly takes notes on his own phone as Kurt shows him the charts he has for the best places to shop locally and some places in Columbus.

“I could always take you along on a day trip the next time I go, if you want?” he asks Blaine when Blaine remarks upon it.

“I definitely want!” Blaine assures him. “When are you going again?”

They agree to spend the day in Columbus in a couple of weeks and start making plans for what to do there besides shopping. Blaine leaves their conversation feeling energized.

When Blaine walks into rehearsals the next day, prepared for what will be an impassioned discussion about what to sing for Sectionals, he finds that Sebastian has taken up residence at the head table. He’s holding Wes’ holy gavel.

“So all in favor of striking while they’re unsuspecting?” Seb asks, and about three-quarters of the hands in the room go up.

“What are we in favor of?” Blaine asks, and the room goes suddenly quiet, hands hastily dropping from the air all over the room.

“We’re voting on whether to spy on the New Directions,” Jeff answers.

Blaine doesn’t quite know what his face is doing but it must certainly communicate his disapproval. “I thought we put all this pettiness behind us last year?” he asks the room at large.

“Well, Sebastian pointed out that since they got all the way to Nationals last year, we should probably keep an eye on them,” Thad answers.

“Oh he did, did he?” Blaine mutters, and he gives Sebastian his best unimpressed look from across the room.

“Come on, Blaine,” Seb says later when Blaine confronts him about it in front of Seb’s car after rehearsal. “Of course I wasn’t casting the vote because you were out of the room. It was a coincidence.”

Blaine stares ahead, trying to determine if he’s being honest. Why would Sebastian do something so sneaky and underhanded?

“I don’t know, Seb. I don’t like this,” he says, still staring resolutely at the forest behind Dalton.

Seb leans in and licks a hot stripe up Blaine’s throat, seals his mouth around his earlobe. “Come on,” he whispers heatedly. “Don’t you want to want to win this year?”

Blaine relents. If it’s just a little spying, what harm could it really do?

Still, the next day he finds Kurt in the usual spot and decides he’s to warn Kurt that the Warblers might be gearing up for a prank.

Kurt brushes it off. They make more plans for the trip to Columbus and discuss ideas for Sectionals (after the mutual agreement that the ideas are off-limits for the actual competition and would likely never be chosen by their respective show choirs anyway).

Over the next few weeks, they start to spend a lot more time talking in the mornings or afternoons about their mutual interests, which – it turns out – there are many.

“I’d love to do some Patti Lupone but that’s a pipe dream for sure,” Kurt sighs one evening, crossing his long, skinny-jeans-clad legs. They’ve been talking for hours; Blaine’s barely noticed the time passing.

Blaine borderline squeals, “I _love_ Patti!”

“Oh my god, have you read her book?” Kurt demands frantically, hands flapping excitedly. It’s adorable.

Blaine fakes as if he’s thinking about the question, and then says, “Of course!”

“You scared me!” Kurt giggles. “Oh my god, never do that again!”

They talk now whenever they see each other at the Lima Bean, which suddenly seems to happen a lot more than it ever did, almost every day. He enjoys their conversations; Kurt is witty and intelligent and one of the most interesting kids he’s ever met.

It’s funny to think they started out as rivals because Blaine thinks they might actually be friends now.

-

Sebastian’s only intel after weeks of spying is that the New Directions are doing a musical theater medley of songs from _Wicked_ , _Hairspray_ , and _Promises Promises_. Blaine votes against doing the same songs to shake up New Directions on the day of the competition. They’re going first so the plan is one that could presumably work.

Blaine tries to argue that this underhanded cheating is unfitting of the Dalton name, but no one’s listening to him. That’s a huge change from last year when Blaine’s ideas were rarely questioned.

Blaine debates whether to do anything and ultimately decides to warn Kurt at the last minute of the plan, and so at Sectionals, the New Directions perform a Michael Jackson medley, singing Control, Man in the Mirror, and ABC. The Warblers follow after with their stolen musical theater medley.

It pales in comparison. The Warblers do not win. The New Directions go on to Regionals instead.

Blaine finds Kurt afterward. “You were amazing out there!” he says.

“Thank you!” Kurt says. “And thanks for the heads-up. I know that wasn’t easy for you.”

“It was the right thing to do,” Blaine says simply. 

Kurt gives him a piercing look that makes Blaine a little uncomfortable. “You know,” Kurt says, “if you’re wanting a change, New Directions is always looking for new members.”

With an eyebrow raise, Kurt departs the stage with his choirmates, leaving Blaine with a lot to think about.

When he gets home, his father is putting a large box in the back seat of his car. Blaine pulls into the parking space next to his dad’s and gets out with his stomach turning knots. There are another three boxes in there at least, and the open trunk reveals a suitcase and a few more boxes.

He’s trying not to assume the worst, not to jump to conclusions, but his parents have been fighting so much more than they ever have.

“Dad?”

His dad starts suddenly. He apparently did not notice Blaine pulling in.

“Oh! Blaine, I. Wasn’t expecting to see you – didn’t you have that competition tonight?”

“Yes. We lost,” Blaine says, voice sharp as barbed wire.

His father looks away. “I’m sorry to hear that, Blaine. I know you boys have worked hard on those songs of yours.”

_Those songs._

Blaine is suddenly blazingly angry.

“So you’re bailing on us?” he asks with forced calm but his hands are trembling hard.

“No, of course not! Your mother and I just need some time apart, and we think it’s best if I stay at a hotel in town for a while.”

“And you were planning to leave while I was out?” Blaine grits out, voice unsteady with emotion. “So you could just avoid this conversation?”

“Blaine, no, it’s just—”

“You know what?” Blaine snaps. “Just go! Mom and I don’t need you.”

“Blaine!”

But he’s not willing to hear whatever excuses his father’s about to give him, and so he heads inside to find his mother. He already knows she’ll be lying in bed with a bottle of scotch in her slack grip, tears on her face.

For the first few days, his mother is inconsolable. Blaine brings her meals in bed, tries to unsuccessfully coax her out of bed for a shower at least, and listens to her hysterics over the separation.

Eventually she just gets sad and monotone about it.

“I thought I could weather the storm, Blaine,” she says. “When I found out about the affair – oh, at first I was ready to end it. Then I thought that our marriage had withstood so much already, I could forgive him for it. But it’s obvious now that he doesn’t think our marriage is a priority.”

She becomes angry not long after that. “I am not a kept woman!” she shouts. “I don’t need him - I can take care of myself!”

The very next morning, as Blaine is preparing a cup of coffee to bring up to his mother, she comes downstairs in a fresh outfit, make-up and hair done perfectly, wearing her customary perfume. She sweeps Blaine up into a hug, wraps him up in her warmth and scent, and Blaine soaks in every moment of that comfort.

“I’m going to be just fine, Blainey,” she whispers. “I have you.”

Blaine’s heart feels heavy with responsibility.

He calls Sebastian from his car on the way to school, biting back his tears.

“Hey champ!” Seb answers.

“Hi,” he says, hating how vulnerable he sounds. “It’s so good to hear your voice.”

“You’re such a sap,” Seb says, and Blaine imagines Sebastian rolling his eyes fondly.

Sebastian immediately launches into a harpooning of the worker at the Starbucks drive-thru, and Blaine tries to listen. He tries not to be disappointed that Sebastian didn’t notice anything different about Blaine’s voice, didn’t notice how upset Blaine is.

When Blaine tells him a few minutes later, Sebastian says, “Shit, Blaine. That’s hard. But it’s what you wanted, right? For them to finally split? Must be a relief to have it finally over.”

Blaine is unsatisfied with Sebastian’s response to Blaine’s situation. He tries to silence that thought quickly, reasons with himself that Sebastian isn’t really a touchy-feely kind of person, and it’s wrong of him to expect Sebastian to be someone he’s not.

But that afternoon at the Lima Bean, Kurt asks him what’s wrong right away, before Blaine’s even said anything. His perceptiveness throws Blaine off enough that he just answers honestly.

He takes sips of his coffee as he talks, overwhelmed by the open compassion and clear attention in Kurt’s gaze. “I don’t know why I’m even upset. I’ve been waiting for this to happen for a long time, since I was a little kid, and I even kind of wanted it to happen after a while. It would have been a lot more peaceful. But my dad actually moving out is something I hadn’t really thought about too much. It’s only been a few days but it already feels different. It’s not even a bad different – it’s just… it’s just different.”

When Blaine’s finished speaking, Kurt pats Blaine on the arm gently. “I’m sorry, Blaine. This must be a lot of pressure for you. I have to say, I’m impressed with how introspective and honest you are about your feelings. Shows how emotionally mature you are, and I think that’s exactly what you’ll need to get through this. And you _will_ get through it, Blaine.”

Blaine feels lighter, understood in a profound way.

Blaine has the sudden thought that it would be nice if Sebastian understood him like Kurt seems to (and _he’s_ not Blaine’s boyfriend) but he tries to drown it out quickly.

As if he can hear Blaine’s thoughts, Seb appears over Kurt’s shoulder in the next moment. 

“What’s going on here?” he asks, sitting down in the spare chair between them.

Blaine feels guilty even though nothing’s going on at all. “Hey! I was just talking to Kurt here. Um, you guys haven’t been formally introduced, have you? Kurt, this is my boyfriend, Sebastian. And this is Kurt, remember? I was telling you about our rivalry last year?”

Kurt grins. “Ah yes, our infamous artists’ clash,” he chuckles. “Nice to meet you, Sebastian.” He holds out his hand but Sebastian doesn’t move to shake it.

“I _really_ like that hat you’re wearing,” Seb says.

It takes a second for Blaine to realize that he’s said it sarcastically. "Seb!” he scolds.

But Kurt bristles and sits up straight. “Well, it’s a McQueen original,” he tells Sebastian sharply, “so you’d be an idiot not to.”

Seb laughs in an uncomfortably nasty manner. “It’s certainly an interesting choice. Definitely the kind of thing a teenage girl might wear but whatever floats your boat.”

Kurt stands up abruptly, grabbing his coffee. “Well, it was good talking to you, Blaine. I’ll be going now.”

“Kurt, wait!” Blaine calls after him but Kurt’s already made it through the door. Blaine rounds on Sebastian. “That was horrible! How could you talk to him like that?”

“I’m sorry, Blaine.” Sebastian’s leaning forward, head cradled in his hands. “I was jealous. I’m such an ass, I’m sorry.”

The wind goes right out of Blaine’s sails. “Just… just don’t do that again, okay? You have nothing to be jealous of.”

“You’re right,” Seb says, and he leans in for a kiss. “I’m so lucky to have such an amazing boyfriend.”

Blaine kisses him back, but he still feels unsettled by the incident.

Blaine finally sees Kurt again a couple of days later, finds him sitting alone at the Lima Bean with a sketchbook. Blaine sits down across from him.

“I’m so sorry about the other day,” he says, and when Kurt looks up at him it feels like he’s gazing right through him. Blaine rubs the back of his neck uncomfortably, can’t shake the sensation that he’s under a microscope Kurt’s controlling. “I just – I feel like I need to explain. He’s never done anything like that before.”

Kurt’s just looking at him, and his eyes are the most unique color… Kurt tilts his head, considering. “I’m confused. Why are you apologizing?”

“Sebastian was horrible to you!” Blaine says, louder than he intended. He scoots his chair closer and lowers his voice. “That deserves an apology.”

Kurt raises an eyebrow. “An apology from _you_?”

Blaine is speechless.

“Blaine?” Kurt flips his sketchbook closed. “If it’s all right, I’d like to give you some advice. I’m usually honest with my friends.”

Blaine’s taken aback. “We’re friends?” he asks softly.

“I think so,” Kurt says. “Don’t you?”

Blaine smiles and looks down so Kurt won’t see how disarmed he is. “Yeah. I do.” Kurt is smiling when Blaine gathers himself enough to look up again.

“Well, since we’re friends,” Kurt says, “here’s my completely free, totally uncensored opinion: your boyfriend is not very nice.”

Blaine’s stomach turns at these words. “That’s not true,” he argues. “Like I said, he’s not usually like that.”

Kurt gives him a very dubious expression. “Okay. I won’t pretend like I know him better than you do, obviously you know him in ways I don’t. But I’ve seen how he acts around here. He’s rude to people when he’s waiting in line, he’s rude to the staff. And honestly? He doesn’t treat _you_ very nicely, Blaine.”

“What do you mean?” Blaine asks but he’s not sure he wants an answer. He feels cornered, somehow.

“I’ve overheard you a couple times in line or at another table. The two of you have a routine: he does or says something inappropriate or mean, then you object, then he apologizes, then you say it’s okay, and then you’re back to square one. Last week I heard him tell you that you were a sissy for liking Katy Perry.”

Blaine looks down at… he doesn’t even have any coffee; he forgot to buy some. There’s nowhere to hide. Sebastian did call him a sissy but it didn’t seem as bad as it does now that Kurt’s said it.

“He was just joking,” Blaine tries to argue but it sounds unconvincing even to him, and he can feel the corners of his eyes prickling. “I know he can be… off-putting, sometimes. But that’s not all there is to him – he can be so sweet and gentle and loving.”

“I’m sure that’s true. I’m not saying he’s a bad person,” Kurt says gently, and he leans forward a little. “But think about it. You don’t want to be apologizing for him for the rest of your life, do you?”

And with that, Kurt says goodbye and gives him an encouraging pat on the arm before he heads out the front door of the shop. Blaine watches him go with a strange feeling in his chest.

Blaine thinks about what Kurt said over the weekend. On Sunday when Seb comes over for lunch, he’s as sweet as Blaine professed him to be to Kurt, and it’s easy to disregard what Kurt said. But on Tuesday, when Blaine’s talking to Kurt and Mercedes after school, Seb comes up and throws his arm around Blaine.

“I thought you were getting us coffee, Blaine?” he says with a chuckle.

“Oh, sorry, I got distracted!” Blaine smiles at Seb and gives him a kiss on the cheek. “I was just talking to these two about last night’s Grey’s Anatomy. It was so good!”

“Ugh, you actually watch that garbage? And you like it?” Seb sneers, pulling a face like he’s sucked on a lemon. “God, your taste is appalling, Blaine. But at least he’s cute.” He says that last part to Kurt and Mercedes in sotto-whisper.

Blaine freezes on the spot, vision going blank from embarrassment and his heart pounding wildly. After a moment, he pulls himself together, breaks free of Seb’s hold, and says “excuse me” to Kurt and Mercedes before walking right out of the Lima Bean. He doesn’t look back.

He drives around for a while, trying to settle his anger. Usually driving and listening to music helps him settle down but this time it’s not working.

Kurt was right.

When he pulls into his driveway, Sebastian’s sitting on the staircase. At the sight of him, Blaine knows he has to end it, and that no amount of Sebastian’s cajoling or sweet-talking is going to convince him otherwise.

“Blaine, I’m sorry,” Sebastian says as Blaine approaches the front steps. “That was—”

“Stop.” Seb’s mouth clamps shut, and he looks surprised. “No more explanations or excuses. That, back there? That was humiliating. You demeaned me in front of my friends, and I – I can’t be with you anymore. You’re…” he starts trembling, “you’re not nice to me, Sebastian. So I need you to leave.” 

He moves around Sebastian to get to the door.

“Come on, Blaine,” Sebastian says coaxingly, getting to his feet. “Just wait and hear me out, you can’t—”

But he leaves Sebastian outside on the doorstep and closes the door behind him, heads inside where it’s warm.

-

Sebastian declares the next morning in the student lounge that he is determined to “win Blaine back”.

He orchestrates another serenade for Blaine that afternoon after school, but this time Blaine walks out of the Lima Bean before he’s even started singing. He throws out every note Sebastian puts in his locker, has his mom delete every text Sebastian sends him. He changes directions when he sees Sebastian at school.

Sebastian has left a bouquet of flowers on Blaine’s car on Friday afternoon when he gets out of class, and almost as if on autopilot he drives straight to the Lima Bean to find Kurt and get reassurance he’s doing the best thing for himself.

“Alright, let’s review here,” Kurt says from after he’s treated Blaine to a coffee and Blaine’s brought him up to speed. “Why did you break up with him in the first place?”

Blaine takes a deep breath. “He’s not nice to me. He’s rude to me and to my friends. And he… he really only treats me well when he’s trying to apologize or make up for something.” Blaine feels a weight lifted from him as he confesses that last part.

“Well, damn,” Kurt says, looking impressed. “I don’t have to add a thing, you’ve got it. But I’ll just add, anyway, that you deserve better, and you just need to remember that until he realizes you’ve moved on.”

Kurt punctuates his words with a hug.

Blaine is so grateful that they’ve become friends.

He’s just washing up from dinner that night when he gets a call from Thad, who sounds thoroughly panic-stricken.

“I’m so sorry, Blaine! We didn’t know it was going to be so bad! We had no idea what Sebastian had planned, I swear!”

“What are you talking about?” Blaine says, and he feels a tingle of intense foreboding.

“Sebastian arranged a meeting between the Warblers and the New Directions. It was a sing-off; he said he saw you two… you know, _together_ at the Lima Bean. He was saying how you betrayed him and the Warblers by extension, and that we needed to teach Kurt and the New Directions about the Warblers code. But we thought it was just going to be a sing-off, Blaine, please believe me!”

“What _happened_ , Thad?” Blaine demands, heart beating wildly.

“They had to call an ambulance. Sebastian threw a slushie at Kurt, and there was something in it – I don’t know what but it was bad; Kurt was in a lot of pain. I’m sor-”

Blaine hangs up and calls Mercedes’ phone. She answers immediately. “He’s okay,” she assures him, and Blaine collapses on to his bed in relief. “He just needs to wear a protector over his eye for a few weeks and take some medication and painkillers, and he’ll be totally fine.”

Blaine’s heart is still pounding wildly but he feels like he can breathe properly. “Oh my god, Mercedes, I’m so sorry!”

“Don’t you apologize, Anderson! It’s Sebastian’s fault, okay? He threw the slushie at Kurt, not you. Apparently there was some rock salt in it. But he’s _fine_ , Blaine.”

“Oh my god,” Blaine whimpers. “This is all my fault.”

“It’s not your fault! No one thinks that except you, okay? Sebastian’s an idiot.”

Blaine isn’t fully taking Mercedes’ words in, as he’s busy trying to find his car keys so he can drive over to Sebastian’s house and…

He doesn’t know yet, but he’ll figure it out.

“Please tell Kurt I’m sorry, and that I’ll visit him this weekend. If he even wants me to,” Blaine adds hastily, grateful when he finally tracks down his keys in the kitchen.

“He definitely wants you to, silly. Please don’t blame yourself.”

Blaine shakes his head as he jams his feet into his shoes. “No, if I was smarter, I would have realized what Sebastian was capable of earlier. That’s on me.”

He hangs up and scales the porch stairs to his car. He drives to Sebastian’s house, has no idea what he’s going to do or say when he gets there but knows he needs to confront him.

This is the last straw.

Sebastian’s car is the only one in the driveway, which means he’s home alone.

Good.

He rings the doorbell and waits on jittery legs until Sebastian opens the door. Sebastian looks exactly the same as he did earlier, doesn’t even appear to be ruffled by what he did. It’s infuriating.

“You are unbelievable,” he spits. “Alright, here’s how this is going to go. You’re going to stay away from me, and away from Kurt. Whatever you think you saw at the Lima Bean, I am _not_ dating him, and even if I was that is absolutely no reason to nearly _blind_ him, you got it? I’ll say it one more time for you since you don’t seem to listen very well: stay away from him, and stay away from me.” 

“Oh sure, pretend you and Kurt haven’t been fucking behind my back for months!” Sebastian shouts as Blaine’s about to turn away.

“What on earth are you talking about?” Blaine snaps. “Wow. You seriously need help, Sebastian. I hope you get it before you do something even worse.”

He turns back towards his car and starts the walk back.

“Have to admit, I didn’t think you had it in you to cheat,” Sebastian calls after him. “Shouldn’t be surprised, though. Like father, like son, eh?”

He yells the last part because Blaine’s already slamming the car door shut in a vain attempt to drown out Sebastian’s words. It doesn’t work.

He sobs the entire way home, on the walk up to his house, inside, and up the stairs. He knows what Sebastian said isn’t true but it’s struck a nerve nonetheless.

And perhaps he’s been fighting back tears for a while now.

When he climbs into bed, he says to himself _that’s enough – you’ve been given a gift here. You know exactly what kind of asshole he is – time to start moving on_.

It actually helps a bit.

-

Kurt’s out of the hospital within the week. He finds a McQueen eye-patch on eBay and manages to make the whole incident into an opportunity for fashion.

And he adamantly refuses to allow Blaine to take any blame for what happened.

“Did you throw the slushie at me, Blaine? Did you tell Sebastian to do it? Did you even know it had happened until afterwards? Well, then, stop.”

Kurt also doesn’t want to press charges.

“It’s not because he’s my ex, is it?” Blaine checks when Kurt tells him. “Because you should know I would fully support your decision to press charges. I mean, just because he’s left me alone this week doesn’t mean he might not try to do something terrible again.”

“No, Blaine, I just really don’t want to,” Kurt says. “His punishment is that he’s gotta live with the knowledge of what he’s capable of now. And maybe that doesn’t bother him yet but I think it might one day, and it certainly will if he _keeps_ treating people like that. Plus, I’m pretty sure he’s smart enough to know that he got lucky this time around – that it wasn’t worse, and that I haven’t pressed charges.”

During Kurt’s confinement to his home for recovery, Blaine becomes a mainstay at the Hummel home.

He comes over right after school every day and stays until just before curfew. He meets Kurt’s mother and father, who are lovely people that always make room for him at dinner.

Kurt’s mother is beautiful; she has long brown hair that falls gracefully over her shoulders, and it’s obvious where Kurt got his fashion sense from. Kurt’s father is very different from her and Kurt, all flannel shirts and baseball caps and an initially stern exterior but clear heart of gold.

From the get-go, Blaine can see that they love Kurt in a way that is palpable, and that they would do anything for him.

Kurt and Blaine do a lot together while Kurt’s recovering – online shopping, watching television and movies, talking about boys (fictional and real ones).

Kurt also talks about more personal matters, specifically about his mother’s bout of breast cancer when Kurt was eight, how much it both rocked their family and yet made them that much stronger. He talks about how his father is his hero – ran for congressman three years ago because Kurt was being bullied in middle school and couldn’t stand by and watch the school administration and then the school board shift responsibility.

Kurt talks about how nervous he was to come out but that when he did during his freshman year of high school it went over unbelievably well. He tells Blaine that his parents just took him out for dinner and said how proud they were of him for his bravery and honesty with them, and that they loved him deeply.

It’s a different coming out than his own. Blaine never actually officially came out to his parents; his parents found out when he was hospitalized for taking Owen to the Sadie Hawkins dance. His mother cried and asked why he never said anything (“I was going to, Mom, I just hadn’t found the words yet…” he’d sobbed to her). To this day, his father has said nothing about Blaine being gay, neither affirmative or negative. He had nixed the plan for Blaine to attend high school in Lima in favour of Dalton and its zero-tolerance policy for violence, and he’d signed Blaine up for boxing lessons, and that was it.

Blaine keeps his coming out story (or lackthereof) to himself, uncertain how Kurt will respond.

The day Kurt regains full use of his vision, the two of them celebrate by going out for coffee. Blaine’s heading for a seat in the Lima Bean when Kurt asks if he wants to go for a drive with the coffee instead. Blaine happily agrees.

But once Kurt pulls out of their parking space and they’re driving, Kurt clears his throat. “So, hey, what’s going on with you lately?”

“Not a whole lot,” Blaine says with a shrug. “I’m glad you’re back at full strength!”

There’s a pause, and then Kurt says, “I mean, how are things going for you in your life? You haven’t said much about yourself, well, really at all.”

Blaine’s confused. “What?”

There’s another moment of silence, and then Kurt pulls over to the side of the road and puts the car in park before turning to him.

“Well, you haven’t really talked about the Sebastian thing except to rag on him with me, and I’m just wondering how you’re feeling about the break-up. And I guess I’m also wondering what’s going on with you and your family, and I thought maybe you’d rather talk about your stuff if we weren’t in public. You seem really private about your life, and I just want to make sure I haven’t been a really lousy friend and dominated all our conversations.”

Blaine feels caged in for a moment and has no idea why. “I—I don’t understand what you mean.”

“You don’t talk about yourself,” Kurt says.

“I talk about myself,” Blaine argues, racking his brain for examples.

“You really don’t,” Kurt says. “I mean, you talked about your parents that one time, after I asked, and obviously there was the stuff with Sebastian before you broke up but I kind of forced your hand on that one, too. Honestly, apart from those two times, I don’t think you’ve ever really talked about yourself, and never of your own volition. At first I didn’t notice, which says a lot about how much I like to talk, but you always deflect questions back to me or change the subject. You’re really good at it, I imagine you’ve been doing this for a while so I’m really glad I’ve picked up on it.”

Kurt's looking at him in a shrewd way that Blaine's never experienced before.

“It’s not just you,” he admits to Kurt, and to himself, after very long, profound pause. It feels strange to be talking about himself – it really, truly does. “It’s everyone.”

Kurt just looks at him, gives Blaine his full attention.

And Blaine just starts _talking_.

“I guess the truth is that I’ve never really had anyone to talk to about these things. My brother is 14 years older than me and he was out of the house long before I was able to communicate my thoughts and ideas in a concrete way, so it was kind of like being an only child.” He keeps his gaze downward, doesn’t feel quite strong enough to get through this while making eye-contact with Kurt.

“It’s not like I was a lonely kid. I’ve always had friends I could talk to about this stuff if I wanted to but I never really felt like I could. And I rarely invited my friends over - I didn’t want them to hear my parents fighting, which they did – all the time. And when I went over to other people’s houses it was almost like I experienced culture shock – family dinners are peaceful affairs for most people? They don’t start out with both parents at the same table and end inevitably with the parents in separate rooms? Other people’s parents can get along for more than a few hours at a time?”

Kurt is turned sideways, posture straight. “So it’s been like that for a long time, then?” he asks.

“My whole life,” Blaine croaks out. “According to Cooper, things started to get rocky when he was about 10 years old, so when I came along they were already experts at marital conflict.”

“But you said they’ve separated, right?” Kurt checks.

“Yeah,” Blaine says. “It’s weird. My mom’s unpredictable – some days she seems fine, and other days I come home and she’s not okay at all. But I suppose that’s normal – they’ve been a codependent mess for over a decade. And, well, I have no idea about my father; I haven’t seen him since the night of Sectionals.”

Kurt looks shocked. “But that was ages ago!”

“It was my choice,” Blaine explains. “He’s tried calling but I don’t want to talk to him.”

“You’re upset with him,” Kurt says, completely without judgment, and Blaine has no idea how Kurt manages to do that.

“Yeah,” Blaine mutters, throat tight with emotion. “I came home that night and he was packing the car and trying to escape before I got home so he wouldn’t have to face me. That – that’s pretty damn cowardly if you ask me,” Blaine grits out, and now there are tears forming. “He didn’t – he didn’t even _try_ to have a conversation with me about it.”

Kurt pulls Blaine in for a hug that’s warm and sweet-smelling.

“Can I suggest something?” Kurt asks hesitantly, after they pull away from the hug and Blaine drags knuckles under eyelids. He inclines his head against the seat’s headrest, waiting for Kurt to continue. “Please tell me if I’m overstepping, but I think maybe you need to tell him how you feel.” When Blaine looks reluctant, Kurt adds, “For you, Blaine, doesn’t have to be for him.”

Blaine really starts to cry now.

He’s never had a best friend before but he knows instinctively that Kurt is it.

And he does tell his dad how he feels. He calls him as soon as he gets home.

“I need to get this all out, okay,” he says when his dad starts talking immediately. “I’m angry with you, and I’m allowed to be. You just _left_ , Dad.”

“I know, I’m sorry, Blaine. I—”

“No, let me talk. I know you’re sorry, you’ve been calling me for weeks with apologies. But I need you to understand that that was not okay. I know you and Mom have been bad for years, this isn’t about that. It’s about the fact that you shouldn’t have tried to leave when I wasn’t home. You should have faced me… like a man.”

His father sighs. “You’re right, Blaine.”

“I know I’m right,” Blaine says, and he feels a whole lot less angry all of a sudden. “Look, do you want to have some coffee after I finish school tomorrow?”

“More than anything.”

Blaine cries again.

It’s been an eye-opening, emotional day for Blaine.

Over coffee, his father explains what Blaine already knows; he and Blaine’s mother had been fighting for years, and he’s sorry that it came to an affair and while the affair is over now he can’t take back how much he hurt Blaine and Blaine’s mother. He says his plan is to find a place in the next town over so there’s some space between them but very little space between him and Blaine.

They agree to spend time together at least once a week.

Blaine tells his father what happened with Sebastian, editing out some of the finer details (like Sebastian’s accusation that Blaine cheated like his dad). He says he might like to transfer out of Dalton once the school year is up, and his father agrees that’s probably wise. Blaine talks about Kurt and their awesome friendship.

His father listens to everything Blaine has to say, and when they have to part ways for their cars in the driveway of the coffee shop, his father gives Blaine a strong, firm hug.

-

Kurt and Blaine finally go to Columbus for the day. They take turns driving and make stops for coffee, singing showtunes at the top of their lungs on the way.

At one point they begin discussing marriage equality.

“I mean, if drunk people can get married to someone they met an hour ago by an Elvis impersonator, that’s a bigger insult to marriage than two gay guys getting hitched,” Kurt says.

“Totally,” Blaine says emphatically.

“It’s only a matter of time,” Kurt sighs, and he sounds wistful. “I can’t wait until I can get married. It’s going to be the wedding of the century. Right behind the Royal Wedding.”

“That important, huh?” Blaine teases.

“Well, of course! It’ll be a Hummel wedding.”

“Hey, I don’t doubt it,” Blaine says. “It will certainly be the most fabulous shindig of all time.”

Kurt whoops. “Exactly! So what about your wedding? Will it be fabulous like mine?”

“Oh,” Blaine says, “actually, I don’t want to get married.”

“Really?” Kurt asks, clearly surprised. “Can I ask why not?”

Blaine feels uncomfortable for a moment at the prospect of sharing. Then he remembers that Kurt is someone he can talk to about how he feels. That Kurt _wants_ to know how he feels.

“Well,” Blaine says, a little nervous that Kurt will judge him, “I’ve kind of been witness to a fairly rotten marriage for most of my life. And I know they’re not all like that,” he adds quickly because he assumes that will be the counterargument, “it’s not just that, it’s also that marriage just isn’t something I want, or really ever wanted. I never really fantasized about getting married when I was a kid, and everything to do with weddings and marriage on tv and in the movies just didn't resonate with me.” He hesitates then takes the plunge. “And I just can’t stand the possibility that I might find myself married to someone I don’t love anymore. That would be just the most horrible thing. I know that probably sounds really sad to you.”

Kurt’s quiet for a moment until he says, “No, Blaine. I don’t think it’s sad. Marriage isn't for everyone. And hey, you don’t have to get married to be with someone you love.”

Blaine feels oddly relieved by Kurt’s words. “Exactly. I still want that big love that everyone talks about, and commitment and intimacy. But not marriage.”

“That’s totally okay,” Kurt tells him.

And as they both descend into thoughtful silence for a few moments, it becomes immediately clear that (Not) Getting Married Today is playing on Kurt’s iPod, and they both boggle at each other before cracking up.

“What are the odds!?”

-

In the spring, Kurt meets someone.

His name is Chandler Kiehl, and unfortunately he is one of the most annoying people Blaine has ever met. When he first meets Blaine he starts talking a mile a minute, so fast Blaine can barely keep up, complimenting his school uniform and his hair and asking him for his favourite renaissance era Disney film.

Blaine tries to keep up, attempting to exchange a mystified look with Kurt who just grins and shrugs every time. Kurt looks different than usual. Excited, cheeks flushed. It becomes quickly obvious that Kurt is into Chandler so Blaine puts on his polite face whenever Chandler’s around, and listens politely when Kurt raves about him while they’re in private.

“He is the biggest flirt so at first I thought maybe it was just for fun,” Kurt tells him about a week after Blaine’s met Chandler. They’re going through their skin care regimen over the phone, as they do most nights now. “He flirts with everyone so I wasn’t sure at first. But now I know he’s definitely interested.”

“How do you know? Did he say something?” Blaine asks.

“He asked me out!” Kurt bursts out. “Oh my god, I’ve been wanting to tell you for the whole call.”

Blaine laughs as he closes the lid on his moisturizer. “Why didn’t you?

“I didn’t want to just come right out with it.”

Blaine says, “one sec, just gonna rinse,” and then, “k, I’m back! So tell me how he asked you out!”

“He asked me out for dinner at Breadstix on Friday. But oh my god, first he said, ‘Are you Google? Because I finally found what I’ve been searching for.’” 

Blaine groans good-naturedly. “That’s a terrible pick-up line!”

Kurt giggles. “I know, right?” 

When he’s getting ready for bed after they get off the phone, Blaine starts to feel a little lonely. After some consideration, he decides he needs to get himself out there again. Sure, Sebastian was a nightmare, but they can’t all be.

He makes a dating profile the next morning before school and by the time he’s arrived home at the end of the day he’s got a bunch of matches. He looks through the other profiles, not altogether interested in any of them, and is just about to turn off his computer and go to bed when he gets a message from someone named Eli C.

_Hey sexy… lookin’ for a fun time?_

He debates with himself about it. He’s not sure if he wants a quick hook-up; he didn’t feel great about himself after hooking up with Sebastian in those first few weeks of their… dalliance. And in the end, he’d thought he had a connection with Sebastian, and that had turned out terribly. But then, it might be a while before he has an opportunity to be with someone he has a real connection with.

Blaine invites Eli over on Saturday since his mother will be out of the house all day. He meets Eli at the door. He’s cute, and he seems to think Blaine is, too.

Blaine finds that he is extremely nervous.

“Hey, come in. Do you want anything to drink?”

“A glass of water would be great, actually,” Eli says, and Blaine quickly escapes to the kitchen to fix that up for him. When he turns back around with the water, Eli’s right there. “Hey,” he says, and Blaine can’t help but note that he’s actually quite sexy.

Blaine’s never gone further than hand jobs and blow jobs, and Eli seems completely fine with just doing that but Blaine pushes a condom at him with his heart careening in his ribcage. When Eli slides inside from behind, Blaine tries to relax and focus on the moment. It feels good, especially once Eli starts moving properly and gets his hand around Blaine’s cock. Eli’s gentle and kind. After, he tells Blaine to call him any time.

He calls Eli again on Monday, and Eli invites him over. It’s even better than the last time, Blaine standing with his palms flat against the wall beside Eli’s bed and Eli pulling Blaine’s hips back on to his cock. No one’s home so Eli encourages Blaine to be loud about it, which he acquiesces to happily.

And Blaine’s getting really good at giving blowjobs.

Before long there’s a somewhat regular routine established of meeting up once or twice a week to hook up. They don’t talk much, and at first that was a little strange but Blaine quickly finds that it suits him well to not have someone asking questions about his life that he doesn’t want to answer.

He doesn’t realize he’s kept the casual sex with Eli from Kurt until Kurt looks up from Blaine’s phone notification one afternoon about a month in, with a guilty expression. “Sorry, didn’t mean to look, I just kind of saw it, I… you’re seeing someone? And you… you didn’t tell me?”

Now he looks hurt.

Blaine scrambles on to Kurt’s bed from where he was stretching on the floor. “Oh, no, it wasn’t a secret or anything, just a… we aren’t seeing each other, he’s just someone I… well, you know.”

“Someone you… have sex with?” Kurt asks, looking quite intrigued and a bit excited. “You’ve done that?”

Blaine crosses his legs, gets comfortable. “Yeah. I mean, I dated Sebastian," he jokes. He’s about to admit they made out the first time they met but he stops himself, suddenly sure Kurt will judge him for that. “We didn’t do everything but we did some stuff – you know, hand jobs and blow jobs. But with this guy, Eli? We actually went all the way.”

“Oh?” Kurt says, sort of breathless. “What was it like?”

Blaine thinks for a moment. The short answer is that it was nice but the longer, more honest answer is that it’s complicated, and Blaine has been fighting the nagging feeling for a while now that sex is not nearly all it’s cracked up to be. So he says so.

Kurt clears his throat after, looks around as if Blaine’s mother is going to pop out suddenly. “Did you… you know, give or receive?”

Blaine starts laughing before Kurt’s finished speaking, and by the end he’s rolling around on the bed. Kurt slugs Blaine in the shoulder. “Stop it,” he says, giggling. “Don’t laugh at me!”

“I’m not laughing at you, I promise! You just make it sound like it was a present or something,” Blaine wheezes out though his own giggles.

“Well, isn’t it?” Kurt says, raising his eyebrows. 

They’re both laughing now.

The following week, when there’s a pause following their discussion about the best Sondheim piece over their skincare routine, Kurt says, “So… what would you say if I told you I’m thinking about having sex with Chandler?”

Blaine drops his lotion; it was a bit of a non-sequitur. “Um. Are you? Thinking about it, I mean?”

“Yes,” Kurt says.

“Okay. Well. I mean, I’d say that you should do whatever you want to do as long as you’re both on board?”

“Right. But do you think it’s a good idea?” Kurt asks. “We’ve only been dating for a little while. Is it too soon?”

“I don’t think there’s really a ‘too soon’ rule of thumb – I think it depends on each person. I can’t really tell you whether it’s a good idea. I guess the question is, do you want to have sex with him?”

A beat, then, “I think I do.”

“Well, that’s great!” Blaine says, then adds with a grin, “Sooo do you want some sex tips, or?”

“Oh my god, no,” Kurt says in a rush, laughing hard. “Thanks, Blaine.”

“Sure!” Blaine says. “I’m glad we can talk about these things!”

It’s an entire agonizing week before Kurt brings it up again.

“I did it. Or… well, we did it.”

Blaine’s driving but he manages not to crash the car. “Jeez! You pick a hell of a time to bring it up,” Blaine admonishes, giving Kurt a look. “But how was it!?”

“A little awkward at first,” Kurt says after a long pause, “but mostly it was really nice. I feel different now. Things with Chandler seem different now.”

“Oh yeah?” Blaine asks, glancing over. Kurt looks like he’s really thinking about it.

“I don’t know, it just feels like there’s a deeper connection now.”

Blaine aches for what Kurt just described. He’d thought that he’d had that with Sebastian… He wonders if he’s ever going to find something – some _one_ – like that, and how long he’ll have to wait. Shaking off the melancholy, he brings himself back to the conversation at hand.

“So, is Chandler as talkative in bed as he is out of it?” he asks innocently, and Kurt swats at him with an indignant, amused squawk.

-

In early April, his parents’ divorce is finalized and his father officially moves into his new house. His father sets up a bedroom for Blaine to use when he visits and Blaine brings a suitcase of outfits over to hang in the closet and put in the chest of drawers. His father looks extremely happy while Blaine’s unpacking his things.

Both of his parents seem genuinely happy now, and that happiness is infectious. His mother has even started going on some dates! Blaine hasn’t been impressed just yet by any of the men she’s introduced to Blaine at the door when they pick her up, but it’s a start.

Cooper is just as amazed by the change in each of their parents.

“They’re different people!”

Blaine agrees. They really are different, and so much better to be around.

And then, at the end of the month, Kurt gets his letter of acceptance to NYADA. Kurt will be moving to a new state soon. They won’t be able to see each other all the time like they do now.

Kurt takes a job at the Lima Bean over the summer. When Blaine stops by the Bean on the days Kurt is working, Kurt gives Blaine free coffee, smirking at Blaine whenever he takes out his wallet (which he does, every time). Blaine accepts the job offer at King’s Island again, which is a good distraction from the sadness of Kurt leaving.

But it’s only when Blaine says goodbye to Kurt at the airport with Kurt’s parents in August that Blaine realizes how much he’s relied on Kurt these past few months, and how hard it’s going to be to spend another year in Ohio without him.

-

Blaine starts the new school year at McKinley and immediately auditions for glee. He’s already discussed audition songs with Kurt and come up with several options and decides to do an impromptu performance of It’s Not Unusual in the courtyard of the school. He’s accepted right away.

New Directions is very different from the Warblers. There’s no council making democratic decisions. Everyone talks out of turn and interrupts Mr. Schuester’s lessons to sing significant solos or duets to other glee club members. But that’s not so bad, since Mr. Schuester’s lessons are, as Kurt had warned him, a bit obvious and overdone.

And yet, without a doubt, Blaine is having more fun now than he ever did with the Warblers.

In September he makes plans to visit New York the following month to look at potential schools so he can choose where he wants to go when he graduates. Kurt invites Blaine to stay with him and Rachel in Bushwick where they live. Blaine gladly accepts.

And then a week before the trip, Kurt calls Blaine in tears. “Chandler broke up with me.”

“Oh my god, Kurt, I’m so sorry!” Blaine gets out of line at the grocery store, leaving the cart by the door with the food still inside. He makes his voice as gentle as possible as he gets into his car and doesn’t start the engine, just sits. “What happened?”

“He said he wants to ‘explore other options,’” Kurt says, sniffling.

Blaine’s mouth drops open. “Are you _serious_? What a punk!”

Kurt snorts, and just like that Blaine knows he’s going to be all right. “A punk, Blaine? Really?”

“Absolutely! Total punk.” Then he gets serious. “Come on, Kurt, he’s obviously a complete idiot.”

“He is?” Kurt says, and it kills Blaine how vulnerable he sounds.

“Well, duh. What option could possibly be better than you?”

Kurt’s silent for a moment. “Damn,” he mutters. “You really know how to cheer a guy up, huh?”

“Honestly, he was never good enough for you, anyway. I mean, you’re Kurt Hummel.”

Kurt sighs. “Thank you, Blaine. That’s really nice of you to say.”

“Nope, just stating the obvious; nothing nice about that.”

-

Kurt meets Blaine at the airport the following week with a sign that says ‘Mr. Anderson’. Blaine laughs out loud when he sees it and runs the remaining distance to throw his arms around Kurt.

“I’ve missed you!” Blaine says into Kurt’s shoulder.

“I’ve missed _you_ ,” Kurt whispers back.

When they pull apart, Blaine is transfixed by how much Kurt’s changed already. Blaine’s seen him on Skype many times in the last couple of months but in person it’s obvious that Kurt is getting longer and leaner and… well, hotter.

“Have you been working out?” he asks.

Kurt beams and winks as he takes Blaine’s bag from him. “A man never reveals his secrets.”

Then Blaine is distracted by New York. He’s been here before with his parents when he was a kid but it’s a whole now experience now that he’s planning to move here in less than a year. Kurt points out places he’s been since he arrived and pulls Blaine away when he tries to buy a hot dog from a street vendor. “Not from that one. Trust me, I’ll show you the spot with the best dog in the city.”

They eventually make it to Kurt’s apartment, and Blaine is blown away by it.

“You live here? This place is huge! And it’s beautiful!”

Kurt preens. “We got lucky with the price but the decor I will take absolute credit for.”

Blaine puts his things in Kurt’s room and they head back out into the city to explore, since Blaine only has a very short time in the city. Kurt takes him to Central Park, to Times Square, and to a showing of _Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?_ on Broadway. Blaine cries.

They get back to Bushwick rather late, giddy and full of life from the day and evening out. When they climb into bed that night, Blaine savours the feeling of sharing this wonderful city with his best friend.

-

The New Directions lose at Sectionals because Marley Rose collapses on stage. Marley talks in glee club about how she’s struggling with an eating disorder, and the choir members all rally around Marley, except for Kitty. Kitty is one of the meanest people Blaine has ever met. She’s always ready with a rude comment for somebody, particularly Marley and Unique, and sometimes Blaine although he tries not to let it bother him. Something about Kitty reminds Blaine of Sebastian.

Due to the loss, the New Directions don’t have a performance to prepare for. They mostly end up performing whatever songs they want, and the younger students help the seniors prepare for their auditions to schools with music departments. Mr. Schuester gives suggestions to help them improve.

Blaine’s become friends with Tina and Sam. Blaine and Sam are planning to get a place together in New York, and Tina says she would join them if she wasn’t most likely going to Brown.

Blaine and Unique go shopping once a week.

He doesn’t want to jinx it but Blaine’s had a pretty good year so far.

-

In December, Kurt tells Blaine that he’s met someone new. It’s not exactly surprising to Blaine; Kurt is so awesome it’s no wonder he’s already found someone else. His name is Adam, and he’s British and has his own glee club at NYADA.

He’s also the sexiest man alive, according to Kurt.

“He complimented me on my plié when I was practicing in one of the dance studios. It was so sexy, Blaine! And then he used his hands to help me keep my posture straight—let’s just say the courtesy curtain at our loft did nothing to shield our volume from Rachel once we finally got back to the loft.”

Kurt decides he’s going to stay in New York over Christmas. Blaine tells Kurt he understands, says, “I mean, Christmas in New York? You have to stay!” but he’s kind of heartbroken. He was really looking forward to spending a few days with Kurt. But they talk on Skype for a couple of hours on Christmas, and Blaine meets Adam very briefly.

In February, Tina asks Blaine to the Sadie Hawkins dance. She’s become fairly smitten with him but he quickly sets the record straight: “I’m gold star gay, Tina. But I’m happy to go with you as friends! And I promise, if I had any interest in girls, you’d be the one for sure.”

Blaine really appreciates their friendship, especially since he hasn’t been able to see Kurt in a while, and when they talk it’s usually short conversations. Blaine knows it’ll be different next year. He and Tina go to the movie theater that shows cult classics, and they sing duets in Blaine’s basement.

Blaine’s so busy that the weeks pass quickly, and soon it’s Spring Break, and Blaine’s traveling to New York again to look for apartments. He’s staying with Kurt once more and is nearly vibrating out of his seat as the airplane lands.

Kurt pounces on him. “Oh my god, it’s so good to see you! I feel like we barely get to talk anymore!”

“I know,” Blaine says, pressing his face into Kurt’s shoulder and enjoying Kurt’s strong scent for a moment. “God, you never mentioned how busy senior year is.”

Kurt laughs. “Sorry, I should have warned you! Come on, I can’t wait for you to meet everybody. We’re having a potluck at our place. You can meet Adam and Elliott and Dani. And you can see Rachel and Santana again!”

The potluck is breathtaking. It’s exactly the sort of community Blaine’s always envisioned for himself, in a big city full of life.

Elliott and Dani are members of Kurt’s recently formed band ingeniously called One Three Hill. They seem to have a unique chemistry as a trio, bantering back and forth and talking excitedly about upcoming shows.

Elliott is the nicest guy in the world. He’s also very tall and very attractive and very funny. “So you’re the famous Blaine, Kurt’s told me all about you!” he says when they’re in the same space together. He manages not to tower over Blaine the way some tall people do.

“He has?” Blaine asks, surprised.

“Oh yeah! He says you’re the most talented person he knows besides himself and Rachel.”

Blaine blushes. “Oh, I don’t know about that.”

Elliott laughs and slugs Blaine on the arm. “He said you’d say that.”

Dani is also really cool. She acts like she’s known Blaine for years instead of minutes, and it doesn’t come across as forced at all. “Where’d you find those suede shoes?” she demands as soon as she sees Blaine.

Blaine’s so excited to tell her. “Well, actually, they’re really hard to find now. It’s a German shoe, Lloyd Serge. I found these at a thrift shop, it was like they’d never been worn!”

Dani stares down at them reverently. “Shit!” she says. “You are thrifty all right!”

Santana calls him three different fond insults in the first thirty seconds he talks to her, and Rachel makes Blaine promise to duet with her after dinner.

And then there’s Adam. He’s cute. A grainy Skype image did not do him justice. Kurt moves away to attend to something in the kitchen almost immediately after introducing them.

“Nice to meet you, Blaine,” Adam says kindly.

“Good to meet you,” Blaine says politely. “Kurt tells me you run the glee club at NYADA?” He feels very adult as he takes a sip of his champagne.

“Oh, I don’t know if I run it but it’s a fun group of people,” he says, and Blaine detects no dishonesty in his humility. “Kurt says you’ll be going to school here next year?”

“That’s the plan,” Blaine says. There’s a moment of awkward silence between them, and then Rachel calls them all to the table for dinner.

“This is amazing!” Blaine enthuses, looking down at the spread. “I’m sorry I didn’t bring anything.”

“Oh, stop,” Rachel says, laughing. “Your company is enough, and besides, we didn’t expect you to bring something on the plane with you.”

“But still, a potluck is a potluck,” Blaine says.

“Quit it, Blaine,” Kurt says firmly as he sets down a bowl of carrot salad. Then he adds with a smirk, “I mean, Elliott over there brought a bag of mini-croissants from the store around the corner.”

Elliott grins. “Aren’t they beautiful?” He lifts them up and shows them off. They all applaud.

Or, everyone applauds except for Adam. Blaine considers Adam’s sour expression directed toward Elliott for a moment but then Kurt is bringing out the pièce de resistance (a cheese soufflé) and everyone gets busy loudly admiring it.

“Will everyone simmer down so we can eat?” Santana yells over the din.

Once everyone’s seated, the meal and the conversation begin.

Blaine feels truly at home.

-

In April, Blaine gets acceptance letters from NYADA, NYU, Ithaca, and Syracuse. He nearly has a heart attack when he considers the decision he has to make now, with so many schools willing to take him. He is genuinely shocked that he has managed to accrue so many acceptances.

“OH MY GOD, BLAINE!” Kurt squeals when Blaine calls to tell him and to ask what school he should attend. “You’re so amazing!”

Blaine blushes; he doesn’t take compliments very well. “But where should I go?” he asks.

“Well, obviously it would be so cool if you came to NYADA. But I don’t know, Blaine, which one do you want to go to?”

Blaine has no idea.

Cooper is very unhelpful when he says Blaine should have applied to schools in California so they can see each other more.

Everyone has a suggestion but in the end Blaine decides on NYADA, partly because Kurt and Rachel are there but also because it’s a renowned school that can help launch his career.

To Blaine’s surprise, his parents call a truce of sorts and take him out to celebrate his success as a family.

To Blaine’s even greater surprise, they get along extremely well.

-

Blaine’s set to move to New York two weeks after graduation. His mother cries a lot in the lead-up, although she does try to shield Blaine from seeing how emotional she is. Blaine’s father stops by to give him a going-away present, a pocket watch that belonged to Blaine’s grandfather.

“It’s an Anderson rite of passage. Cooper’s had it since he left home, and now it’s your turn to carry it. Whichever one of you has a kid first, you’ll have to hand it down to the next Anderson, okay?”

Blaine cries.

There’s one last big bash in Marley’s basement, and there are tearful goodbyes and promises to stay in touch. Kitty is nicer to Blaine than she’s ever been before, telling him to watch his back in New York for pick-pocketers and the fashion police that will surely arrest him upon sight (“Thanks, Kitty,” he says, forcing a hug on her).

The good news is that he won’t be going to New York alone; he’ll be renting with Artie and Sam in New York, and their apartment is already waiting for them.

Blaine is so excited and nervous he feels a little sick from it.

-

Kurt spends Blaine’s first day in New York helping him move in. Blaine’s delighted because it gives them an opportunity to catch up after so long of only speaking on the phone or Skype.

“You’re going to love NYADA so much, Blaine!” Kurt says from where he’s unpacking Blaine’s decorations. “It’s a crazy place but it’s perfect for artists.”

“I can’t wait,” Blaine says reverently. He’s been organizing his closet and drawers with his clothes for the last twenty minutes or so. After a brief but non-awkward pause between them, Blaine remembers what he’s been meaning to ask about all day. “Oh, hey! How are things with you and Adam?”

Kurt doesn’t respond immediately which surprises Blaine. “They’re fine,” he says.

Blaine can tell from Kurt’s posture that his answer is not entirely truthful.

“Are you sure?” Blaine asks, and he stops working for the moment to give Kurt his attention.

Kurt shrugs where he’s standing by Blaine’s new desk. “We had a fight the other day.”

Blaine sits down on the floor and beckons for Kurt to join him, which he does. “What about?”

“Well, it all started with this guy who hit on me in front of him while we were shopping,” Kurt begins, rolling his eyes. “He was pretty grumpy afterwards and I called him on it, and then it came out that he thinks Elliott has a thing for me. I told him that’s not true at all and that he’s just a friend but then he brought up the fact that you slept in my bed with me when you came to visit this year, and how he never said anything but he thought that was inappropriate, too. I tried to explain that it was no different than me sleeping with Rachel.”

“Absolutely,” Blaine says, emphatic. “And anyway, you’d never cheat.”

Kurt smiles. “I told him that, too. He said it’s not that he thinks I would, just that he’s had a few untrustworthy boyfriends before and so he gets suspicious sometimes. I told him that he needs to try not to be so jealous and that I’m not going to stop being friends with other guys because it makes him uncomfortable.”

“Good for you,” Blaine tells him. “What did he say then?”

“He said that I was right and he’ll be better about it from now on,” Kurt says, lifting one of his shoulders in a half-shrug. “And things are mostly back to normal but I guess I’m feeling weird about it because it was our first big fight.”

Blaine pats Kurt’s knee companionably. “Sounds like a pretty civilized fight to me.”

“Yeah. Thanks, Blaine. I feel better now.”

“Good!” Blaine stands up. “Wanna take a break and eat some ice cream?”

Kurt lets out a belly laugh. “That is a great example of a rhetorical question!”

-

They begin attending potlucks at Kurt, Rachel, and Santana’s loft that very first week. It’s an even bigger group now, with Sam and Artie and Blaine joining the fray as well. It’s as warm and comfortable as Blaine remembers, and it really is everything Blaine dreamed of.

But throughout, it is evident that there is very real tension between Adam and Elliott. Whenever Elliott speaks, Adam starts a mini-conversation with someone else or pulls an expression of disinterest or disdain. Blaine keeps one eye on Kurt, who either hasn’t noticed or is doing a really good job of pretending it’s not happening. Blaine suspects the latter based on the white-knuckled grip Kurt keeps on his cutlery.

At the second potluck Blaine attends, Elliott grabs Kurt’s hand after they all sit down to eat and says, “Oh! I forgot to tell you that I booked us a new venue for next weekend!”

Kurt opens his mouth, eyes shining with excitement, when Adam beside him suddenly and audibly scoffs. An awkward silence falls over the group as Kurt stiffens in his chair and puts his fork down on his plate with a sharp clank.

“Adam, is there something bothering you?” Kurt asks in an apparent deliberately cool tone, and in that moment Blaine is super glad he’s not Kurt’s boyfriend because it must be terrifying to be on the other end of the expression on his face.

“Kurt, if I might have a word,” Adam says tersely, and he gets up and marches over to Kurt’s room. Kurt gets up with a small sigh and follows suit.

Blaine exchanges a look of concern with Sam and then Rachel, has half a mind to strike up a conversation with the group so that Kurt and Adam can have some privacy, but there is no pretending they aren’t all curious about the argument about to go down in the other room. Distraction won’t work with these people.

“It is extremely disrespectful for Elliott to be flirting with you, particularly in front of me,” Adam’s saying, and it’s not exactly loud but still very clear from the main room, even with the light music playing on the stereo.

“This again?” Kurt demands in an exasperated tone.

The rest of the table is raptly listening to the drama unfold. 

“Kurt, you have to be blind if you don’t see that he’s interested. He’s subtle about it so I look irrational but I’m not.” Blaine looks to Elliott, who rolls his eyes over at Blaine. Blaine scrunches his mouth up in sympathy. “He obviously has feelings for you, and honestly? I see the way you look at him, and I think perhaps you—”

“You think I _what_?” Kurt snaps, and this time there is no control in his volume. Blaine meets Elliott’s eyes again over the table, and Elliott matches Blaine’s grimace of discomfort. “What are you trying to say here, Adam?”

“I don’t like when he touches you!” Adam shouts, and now Blaine’s on his feet, uncertain about whether to approach but deeply concerned with Adam’s angry tone. He doesn’t know what Adam’s capable of – he’s always seemed level-headed - but he’s shouting at Kurt.

“You are being a jealous Neanderthal right now!” Kurt shouts back. “I thought you said you were going to be better about this, and now here you are making a scene in front of my friends! You’re embarrassing me!”

Blaine feels a buzz of familiarity and can’t help but think back to some of the issues he had with Sebastian.

“Well, if I’m such an embarrassing person then perhaps I should just be on my way,” Adam says in a huff, and moments later he’s pushed aside the privacy partition and begun storming from Kurt’s room. The group assembled at the table starts to eat abruptly, a few striking up sudden conversations.

“Good riddance, Doctor Who!” Santana calls after him, and Blaine’s surprised she didn’t unashamedly shout it at him. But Adam slides the front door closed with a lot more force than necessary so there’s a strong possibility he heard it anyway.

“I’ll talk to him,” Blaine tells Rachel, and heads behind Kurt’s curtain.

Kurt’s in bed, his back to Blaine.

“Kurt?” Blaine says, keeping his voice soft and sweet. When he gets no answer, he crawls across the bed and puts his arm around Kurt to hug him. He doesn’t say anything, just lets Kurt be still while he lets some of the initial frustration out.

“You must think I’m ridiculous,” Kurt says as he turns in Blaine’s arms to face him.

“Now why would I think you’re ridiculous?” Blaine asks.

“Well, obviously it’s ridiculous that I haven't broken up with him.”

“So you feel ridiculous,” Blaine translates.

Kurt answers fervently, “Yes! I knew the jealousy was bad news but I ignored it and pretended it would go away. I’ve been seeing it for months now, and I keep looking the other way. I know I can’t keep dating him if he’s going to be jealous of every male friendship I have, and yet here I am, still with him. That’s pretty ridiculous, isn’t it?”

Blaine shrugs as best as he can in his position. “I don’t know – it’s tough when you really care about someone. You want to give them the benefit of the doubt. You want to believe that with a little work it’ll fit. I think that’s normal.”

Kurt’s eyes swim with tears, and Blaine makes a soft sound of comfort, wiggling closer.

“What do I do, Blaine?” Kurt whispers.

“Want me to give you my friendly, totally uncensored advice?” Blaine asks, purposely using Kurt’s words to Blaine from last year. Kurt’s eyes pop open, and he smiles, nodding. “I’m sure he cares about you, Kurt, but that’s not how you show it. I saw my parents’ marriage fall apart, in large part due to distrust and jealousy, and that is not something you want to endure for longer than you have to. Like you said when I was going through my stuff with Sebastian, you can do better than that. You can do better than a man who doesn’t trust you to be faithful to him.”

Kurt sighs long-sufferingly, and Blaine watches his long eyelashes fan out as he closes his eyes. “You’re really smart, you know that, Blaine?”

Blaine grins. “I try,” he says, preening. “Come on, let’s go have some dinner. We can’t let them use up all the good gossip without us.”

“And by now they’ve finished gossiping about the elephant in the room,” Kurt adds.

Once on his feet, Blaine helps Kurt out of the bed with a little bow and offer of his hand. Kurt laughs as Blaine pulls him to his feet, and they make their way back to the group.

-

There’s a knock on Blaine’s door the next morning just after 8:00 am. Blaine pulls himself out of bed and pads over, blanket wrapped around him.

Kurt is standing on the other side of the door. “I broke up with him.”

Blaine ushers him in and makes Kurt a cup of coffee, and then joins him on the sofa with his own cup. They sit in silence until Blaine’s finished his coffee, and then he says, “Okay. I’m ready to listen, go.”

Kurt sighs. “I went over to his place and told him it’s over. He got really angry and swore at me and kicked me out of the Adam’s Apples.”

Blaine shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “Oh no – whatever will you do without the Adam’s Apples?” Blaine asks with heavy sarcasm, and Kurt snorts. Blaine clears his throat to get rid of the sleep-voice. “So how are you feeling about it?”

“Honestly?” Kurt says, “I feel so much better. That’s not right, is it? I should be devastated that I just broke up with my boyfriend of six months.”

“Why? You don’t have to be devastated about a break-up if the relationship wasn’t good for you,” Blaine points out.

Kurt seems to consider these words as he takes a few sips of his coffee. “This is good,” he says, lifting his mug; Blaine nods in thanks. “I guess you’re right. Still feels like I should be upset, though.”

Blaine nods in understanding as he gets to his feet. “Want some cookies?” At Kurt’s immediate nod, he gets up and drops his blanket on the couch and starts for the kitchen. Kurt joins him, hoisting himself up on to the counter.

“You… uh, you shave your chest?” Kurt asks, and Blaine looks down and realizes he’s not wearing a shirt since he left his blanket in the living room. How did he forget that?

He does his best not to blush as he answers, “Yeah. I don’t like the feeling of it, and it grows like a weed so it looks… let’s just say it doesn’t look attractive.”

Kurt’s nodding over on the counter. “Yeah, I shave mine, too,” he says, and when Blaine looks over, their eyes meet momentarily and they both know he’s imagining Kurt’s bare chest.

Blaine quickly busies himself with the cookies. “Now this is maybe not the best breakfast material but it is definitely good post-break-up material,” he says once he’s finished plating them. He walks over and puts the plate next to Kurt on the island.

He is now very close to Kurt. He can smell Kurt’s cologne and aftershave, can see Kurt’s freckles, and his chest is touching Kurt’s leg.

Blaine locks eyes with Kurt and then they’re kissing, simple as that.

“Oh!” Blaine gasps, and he steps right into the V of Kurt’s legs, drags Kurt closer by the hips and opens his mouth to devour Kurt’s.

Kurt rips his mouth away and starts kissing down his throat to his ear. “Blaine,” Kurt whispers. Blaine grinds his hips up into Kurt’s in reply, keeps his hands fixed to Kurt’s back and pants heavily into Kurt’s gorgeous mouth. “Oh yeah, Blaine,” Kurt moans, thrusting against Blaine with an energy that sucks the air out of Blaine’s lungs.

Their pace is frenzied. Blaine brings his hands up to card through Kurt’s soft hair, drags his mouth down to Kurt’s ear to breathe hot over it. Then he’s back at Kurt’s mouth again, kissing Kurt with a desperation Blaine has no reference point for. 

Kurt slides off the counter and snakes a hand between them to touch Blaine’s cock over the pajama pants where it’s trapped. Blaine pants heavily against Kurt’s throat, hips twitching as Kurt strokes soft and slow over it, again and again – a maddeningly gentle and soft weight – and after a short time and one suspended moment of exquisite tension, he spills inside his underwear. 

Immediately upon coming down from his rather incredible orgasm, Blaine begins to rub over the crotch of Kurt’s jeans, frantic and without technique. In less than a minute Kurt gasps through his own orgasm, his eyes clenched shut and his pleasure a damn near work of art. Blaine takes in every detail of Kurt’s expression.

And then Kurt pulls away, and in a burst of quick motion puts some space between them and starts pacing. “Oh my god, what just happened?”

Blaine watches him, feeling sick. “I – I don’t know, it just sort of… happened.”

“Oh my god. How did that – what did we just do?” He sounds panicked as he turns to Blaine. His eyes are wet.

Blaine’s mouth is dry. He can’t speak, doesn’t know what to say.

Kurt continues, “We shouldn’t have done that. You’re my best friend. I shouldn’t have… I wasn’t thinking. Please tell me I didn’t completely fuck this up.”

Blaine feels like he’s been slapped. He sucks in a breath, pulls himself together, and says, “Of course not! That was just… you just broke up with Adam so you’re probably feeling a little raw, and it’s been a while since I’ve… done that with someone, and I’ve been lonely lately. So we can just…”

“Forget this happened?” Kurt says quickly, eyes wide and hopeful. 

Blaine nods rapidly, “Of course.”

Kurt finally stops pacing and turns to him. Kurt’s hair is all messed up – Blaine did that. He clears his throat. “You…uh, I mean, I should probably start getting ready for my day. I’m supposed to start job searching. I’ll see you at – at the potluck next week?” At Kurt’s nod, Blaine says, “Great. I should go shower. You help yourself to some cookies, and…”—a flash of Kurt’s orgasm flits through his mind and he closes his eyes for a second, willing it away—“if you need an extra pair of pants I think I have one of your old pairs in my closet.”

In the shower, he has plenty of time to consider the stupidity of his dick. Why on earth had he done that? He’s never wanted to do that with Kurt before. Sure, Kurt’s hot and it’s not like Blaine’s never noticed that before. Kurt’s filled out, and he looks good – of course Blaine’s noticed. But he’s never thought about having sex with him.

Okay, maybe he’s _thought_ about it before, but it’s never been more than a fleeting one.

As he scrubs his body clean, head spinning, he has the sinking feeling that they’ve just made a terrible mistake.

-

He has seen Kurt orgasm.

As he thinks about the situation, it’s more and more obvious to Blaine that he’s to blame for the situation. He should never have started that when Kurt was fresh off his break-up. Well, he should never have started it, period, regardless of Kurt’s headspace.

Sam asks him if he’s okay when he gets up later that morning but Blaine doesn’t say anything. 

His body betrays him that night. His brain supplies him with what it would have been like to unhook Kurt’s jeans and touch him skin to skin, and _shit_ , what it would have felt like to put Kurt in his _mouth_. His sleep is restless and haunted with the memory of Kurt’s moans and the way Kurt had said Blaine’s name as he came.

After four straight nights of that, Blaine downloads the Grindr app. He finds someone nearby, someone named Phil who lives a few blocks over. Phil invites him over.

Besides the disaster with Kurt, it’s been a while for Blaine. But they strip as soon as they’re in Phil’s room. “What do you want to do?” Phil asks.

Blaine hands him a condom.

It is exactly what he needs.

Blaine skips Monday’s potluck.

“You sure you’re not coming?” Sam checks for the third time.

“I’m sure, Sam. I’ve got a lot of work to do. Next time.”

Blaine invites Phil over.

Once Blaine’s stopped panting from exertion about an hour later, body slick with sweat, he asks, “Hey, do you want to stay for some pizza?”

They eat pizza in front of the television. Phil tells him he’s in film school, and Blaine tells him he’ll be attending NYADA the following month. Phil says he moved to New York two years ago from Florida, and Blaine tells him about Ohio. It’s surface stuff but it’s nice.

They make loose plans to see each other again.

Over the next week, Blaine devotes himself to preparing for the start of school. He gives his CV to a coffee shop around the corner from his apartment, and they hire him on the spot as a barista which suddenly adds 15 more hours to his schedule. The job is a good way of keeping his mind busy.

He knows that avoiding the awkwardness of the situation with Kurt by distracting himself is a very unhealthy way of coping, and will probably not work in the long run, but it’s the only way he knows how to cope with challenging situations; just press on.

Blaine starts putting off plans with Kurt, returning Kurt’s texts with very perfunctory answers, and purposely missing Kurt’s phone calls. He begs off with legitimate excuses about work, and school starting soon, and Kurt accepts them without issue. He figures it’s a good thing he’s a year behind Kurt at NYADA so he won’t see him at school all the time once the semester starts.

Then Kurt shows up at his door, a little over two weeks from The Day.

“Oh hey!” Blaine says brightly to cover the way his stomach is doing somersaults. “Come on in!”

Kurt does come in but he doesn’t move into the apartment, just stays there in the entrance. “It’s weird now,” he says, and his frown is deep-set.

“It’s not weird,” Blaine says, plastering on a smile. “I’ve just been so busy, that’s all it is.”

Kurt shakes his head. “No, it’s weird,” he says. “It's weird for me, too, and it's fine; I just thought I should come over so we can talk it out and get the weirdness out of the way as quickly as possible.”

Blaine is very uncomfortable talking about it but after a moment he gives in. “Okay, yes, it’s weird,” he says. “I know what your sex face looks like, and that’s not something I can just pretend I haven’t seen.” Kurt looks away. “And you know me, Kurt, I come from a family of people that likes to avoid their problems and pretend everything’s fine. It’s how I deal with stuff, normally.”

“That’s okay,” Kurt says in a reassuring tone. “I don’t see how it wouldn’t be weird after… Anyway, why don’t we take a week or two and let the awkward dissipate a bit.”

Blaine breathes a sigh of relief. “That would be great,” he says.

“Okay, then,” Kurt says. “We’ll pick this back up again in a couple weeks.”

Blaine sees Kurt outside on to the front stoop. The words building burst out of him suddenly, “Kurt, you’re my best friend. I don’t want to lose you because of some lapse in judgment.”

“No, you won’t! I don’t want to lose you, either!” Kurt says. “We’ll always be friends. We’re not gonna let this or anything else get in the way of that. This won’t be long - see you _soon_ , Blaine.”

Kurt waves as he starts walking down the front steps.

When Blaine comes back inside, Sam’s watching him from the kitchen, glass of milk in hand, with his eyebrows raised. “Uh, what was that about?”

Shit, Blaine totally forgot Sam was home. “Oh, nothing,” Blaine says airily.

“Blaine!” Sam shouts suddenly. “Would you just freaking _talk_ to me? This might seem like crazy talk to you but I actually want to _help_.”

Blaine is floored. “O-okay.”

Sam fixes him a cup of coffee, and Blaine thinks about all of the times he’s sat across from Kurt with coffee, and the fact that he’s a little worried things might never stop being weird between them.

“Okay, so a couple of weeks ago Kurt came over,” Blaine says. “The day he broke up with Adam, he came over and we were in the kitchen. And there was just this weird energy in the room, I don’t know. We started kissing, and then things went a bit… further and we got carried away, and now it’s weird and neither of us knows how to fix it.”

Sam is silent for a few moments, clearly thinking. Then, “In our kitchen, dude?”

“Really, Sam? That’s what you’re focusing on? Look, we stayed in our clothes, if that makes it any better.”

“A little,” says Sam, “but in the future, please let’s make the shared spaces sex-free spaces.”

“Got it,” Blaine says, rolling his eyes. “And you wonder why I don’t talk about my problems.”

Sam laughs. “Okay, so the problem is that you guys did some sex stuff and now it’s all weird.”

Blaine blinks. “That’s a… pretty good summary, actually. Yes.”

“Okay so you guys’ll be back to normal soon,” Sam says breezily. “I mean, I’ve dated a lot of the girls in glee and it’s not that weird.”

Blaine makes a scrunchy face. “It’s kind of weird.”

Sam then announces the launch of what he calls Operation ‘Get over the Weird’. He takes Blaine to Callbacks to sing karaoke. Afterwards, they head to a gay bar so Sam can be his ‘wingman’. Sam gives Blaine’s shoulder a companionable punch when a guy asks Blaine to dance, and then he says he’s heading out to spend the rest of the evening with Mercedes, so the apartment will be free for a few hours.

Blaine’s dance partner is called Mark, and he takes Blaine apart on the dance floor and then again in Blaine’s bed.

And Sam was right – Blaine kind of does feel like he’s getting over the weird.

-

And then his semester starts and Blaine is both charmed and overwhelmed by how different college is. He really likes it, particularly his contemporary dance class. Cassandra July is a force to be reckoned with (and seems a little unbalanced) but she appears to like Blaine so he counts himself lucky whenever she tears into one of his classmates.

The hallways are another animal – the gossip is like a living, breathing creature, and Blaine can feel it following him everywhere that first week.

He sees Kurt twice, and they wave both times. It’s still weird and not what they would normally do because Blaine’s pretty sure that before this they would have run to each other and hugged and talked all about Baine’s first week.

Blaine can’t help but curse his libido.

And then one evening when Phil’s over for dinner, Sam invites Phil to the potluck. Blaine says, “Oh yeah, you should totally come!” and then, once Phil has left, he rounds on Sam. “What were you thinking? Kurt’s gonna be there!”

“Well, yeah, it’s at Kurt’s place.”

Blaine closes his eyes and prays for patience. “Do you even remember that whole Kurt-thing I told you about? If it’s weird, Phil’s going to be there to witness it all. Don’t you think it might add to the awkward festivities?”

“Listen, I just thought it’d be good for you to start going again, and it’ll be easier if you’re with Phil so you don’t have to interact with Kurt as much right away. And anyway, Phil’s cool – he’d fit in really well with the group.”

Blaine has to admit that Sam’s logic is sort of sound. But it is nerve-wracking to think that the last person Blaine dated that Kurt met was Sebastian. It’s been a while.

And he is sort of seeing Phil now; it’s nothing serious yet but it’s fun, and something Blaine enjoys that Phil seems to enjoy as well. He likes Phil, and it would be nice to introduce him to his friends.

So Blaine brings Phil to Monday’s potluck. When they get there, Kurt’s in the kitchen as usual, so Blaine sees Rachel first.

“Who is this?” Rachel asks all conspiratorially. “Have you been holding out on me?”

“Rachel, this is Phil. Phil, the fabulous Rachel Berry.”

Phil shakes her hand. “Oh yes! Blaine tells me you’re the best vocal performer he knows.”

Rachel gets that gleam in her eye. “Ooh, I like you,” she says. “You have good taste, Blaine.”

Blaine and Phil laugh, and at that moment Kurt comes out of the kitchen. “Hey Kurt,” he says.

“Blaine!” Kurt looks genuinely happy to see him, and Blaine is elated – things are back to normal! And then Kurt sees Phil. “Oh, um, hello!”

“You must be Kurt,” Phil says, striding forward to shake his hand.

“Oh, yes, I am,” Kurt says, wiping his hand on his apron and shaking Phil’s. “It’s nice to meet you…?”

“Phil,” he tells him, “and it’s good to meet you, too. And wow, whatever you’re cooking in there smells amazing.”

“Yeah, Kurt’s a fantastic cook,” Sam says. “Last time, Kurt made a roast duck and it sounded horrible to me but it was actually delicious!”

Blaine catches Kurt’s eye, and Kurt looks away promptly.

It’s still weird.

“Thanks, Sam. Well, I should get back to my cooking, excuse me,” Kurt says, and he goes back into the kitchen. Blaine follows him in after giving Phil a quick peck on the cheek.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey.” Kurt’s poring over a sauce on the stove and doesn’t look up when he says it. “So you’re seeing someone?”

“Yeah, we met a couple of weeks ago,” Blaine says, coming over to lean against the counter next to the stove.

“Oh, cool. Where’d you meet?” Kurt asks, and he finally looks over but his face is impossible to read.

“Um, actually, we met on Grindr,” Blaine says.

And then Blaine sees an expression that he’s only ever seen directed from Kurt at other people, not him – a look of disapproval. “Oh?” Kurt says, voice casual and incongruent with the look.

Blaine’s so taken aback he’s not even really offended. “Is – is that a problem? You know I’ve used those apps before.”

“Why would it be a problem?” Kurt busies himself with whatever’s in the oven. “You’re allowed to have meaningless hook-ups. I respect your choices.”

“Meaningless hook-ups,” Blaine repeats, and now he’s starting to feel offended. “Okay, it kind of sounds like you have a problem with it.”

“I don’t have a problem with it,” Kurt says, and the tone is just a tad short.

“Well, good, because I know you can be judgmental sometimes but that doesn’t mean you get to judge me,” Blaine tells him.

Kurt turns to him with that damned eyebrow raised. “Yeah, I can be judgmental sometimes,” he says haughtily. “That’s one of my flaws, and I’m willing to admit it. What about your flaws, Blaine?”

Blaine does not like the implication. “Like what?”

“Forget it,” Kurt says with a snort.

“No, you want to point out what’s so wrong with me, you go right ahead.” 

There’s a very long pause, and then Kurt sighs. “Blaine, I didn’t mean anything by it,” he says, turning to him. His eyes are genuine. “I’m being judgmental, like you said. And maybe I’m not totally over the Adam of it all. I’m sorry.”

“Right,” Blaine says gently, “I get it. Okay, I should – I should get back in there.”

“Of course, go ahead!” Kurt says. “I definitely want to hear more about Phil!”

Blaine smiles at Kurt over his shoulder as he heads back into the main area and over to Phil.

The rest of dinner goes smoothly. Kurt is very pleasant with Phil and doesn’t appear to disapprove of him, despite what Kurt had said in the kitchen.

-

That weekend, the whole group goes out to a gay club to celebrate Elliott’s birthday. Phil can’t make it – he texts Blaine _but have fun! kiss (and more) lots of hot boys in my absence ;)_

He finds Kurt at the bar, and with a glass of Cosmo in his system he feels no awkwardness at all between them, only affection and joy that Kurt is here and in his life. “Kurt!” he yells over the pounding bass.

“Blaine!” Kurt grins. “You wanna dance?”

“Sure!”

Kurt’s doing his adorable little shimmies and laughing uproariously at the booty shakes Blaine does for Kurt. It’s so much fun! And when the music gets a little sexier, they get a bit closer and sort of mockingly grind together.

And then they’re _actually_ grinding.

“Fuck, Kurt,” Blaine gasps, and he throws one arm up around Kurt’s neck and starts to ride Kurt’s thigh. He tips his head back; the friction is blissfully good, heat and bright energy and _yes_. And then Kurt’s kissing down his throat and he’s right at Blaine’s ear.

“You’re so hot, Blaine,” he groans, holding Blaine’s hips and rocking his thigh up against Blaine who cries out and clenches his hand in Kurt’s hair before sealing their mouths together. He bites down hard on Kurt’s lower lip, and Kurt whines into his mouth. Blaine whimpers and grinds forcefully down on Kurt’s thigh, groaning and throwing his head back. It feels so good, it’s perfect. How could he have thought this was weird?

And with that thought, Blaine feels a surge of clarity poke through and he pulls away abruptly, despite his body aching to move back into Kurt’s arms. Kurt looks like Blaine’s poured a bucket of water on him. “Blaine?”

Blaine needs to be outside.

He turns and moves his way through the crowd, pushes through the throngs of people until he’s out of the club and on the street. He hunches over, still trying to catch his breath, and not from the energy it took to get outside.

“Blaine?”

Blaine straightens up so he’s facing Kurt, and as he takes him in, as he considers this man that means so much to him, he feels lost.

“What is this, Kurt?” he asks softly. “ _Are_ we just friends?”

Kurt stops short in his attempt to approach Blaine. “I – I don’t know,” he says, and he looks terrified.

Blaine feels terrified, too. “You’re the most important person in my life, Kurt,” he says, “and I don’t want to screw that up. My feelings for you… I’m sorry but they just don’t feel romantic to me.”

Kurt comes closer, looks at Blaine straight on. “I feel the same way,” Kurt says. “But there’s obviously some sort of… sexual attraction here, isn’t there? And that can’t be good for our friendship.”

Blaine nods shakily. “It – it’ll mess up our friendship for sure. I think… maybe we need to… not be around each other for a while.”

Kurt looks so sad that Blaine wants to take it back. “I think you’re right,” Kurt says, soft and fragile. “So… we take a break from being friends.”

Kurt has tears in his eyes, and Blaine realizes quickly that he does, too. He nods. “Just for now,” he says.

He’s not sure if that’s true, though. Some part of him suspects that their relationship has been altered permanently.

-

Blaine breaks off whatever it is he has with Phil and explains that he’s not in the right headspace for something romantic right now. It seems like the right thing to say but truthfully Blaine’s not sure exactly why he doesn’t want to date Phil. He’s really nice, and he’d told Blaine there were no hard feelings and that he wished Blaine well in the future.

There’s just something missing, and Blaine can’t quite put his finger on what.

Blaine tries to get busy with school in the first few days following the break from Kurt, like he usually does when he’s going through something difficult. It doesn’t quite work. Every time he turns the corner at NYADA, he wonders if he’s going to encounter Kurt. When he doesn’t, he is both relieved and disappointed.

Blaine can’t attend the potlucks anymore so he tries going to Callbacks instead. It’s the complete opposite of helpful. The music doesn’t fill him up like it normally does; he has no desire to find the perfect song to sing about his feelings, and some part of it is that he has no idea what his feelings are. What song can accompany the sadness and loss he feels without Kurt as his best friend?

The first week is rough but Blaine’s sure it will get easier.

It doesn’t. He actually feels worse. He thinks about Kurt all the time, about what he’s doing and singing, what new scarf he’s found or what recipe he’s thinking of trying out. When he overhears ridiculous comments in class, he imagines how high on his forehead that eyebrow of Kurt’s would be in response.

Once home from class every day, Blaine parks himself in front of the couch and binges on episodes of Treme, the show they used to hate-watch on Skype together, imagines Kurt’s snarky comments to it.

Sam tries on several occasions to wheedle information out of him but all he’ll say is that he and Kurt are taking a break from being friends for a while, and that he just needs to be left alone.

He nearly calls Kurt every day, and deletes numerous inquiring text messages before he can send them. He wants to get in touch again and bridge that gap but he knows there’s nothing to say. They’ve said it already.

And he’s been having dreams about Kurt, the kind of dreams he shouldn’t be having.

Midway through the third week of their separation, Blaine gets a call from his mother who says she’s met someone she might want to marry. Blaine only says that he’s happy for her and does not ask, though he wants to, if that’s such a good idea after everything with his dad. He tries not to panic at the realization that he doesn’t even know what this man looks like let alone how he treats Blaine’s mother.

There’s only one person Blaine wants to call with this information and his complicated reaction to it. But what if his raw emotions cause him to inappropriately turn to Kurt for relief? It strikes Blaine that he’s never felt this lonely in his life, and part of him curses himself for ever becoming friends with Kurt because at least back then he didn’t know how hard it could be without Kurt in his life.

At the one month mark, Blaine feels no closer to coming to terms with the loss of Kurt’s friendship. He’s still having dreams, and that’s as good a reason as any not to reach out even though he wants nothing more. He keeps thinking that they made a mistake but goes around in circles, reminding himself that they didn’t really have a choice.

It’s starting to affect his school work. He barely gets through midterms, is so distracted that he has a hard time studying and focusing on homework assignments. 

And then, in late October, Blaine answers the door to Santana and Elliott. He invites them in and is about to start making coffee when Santana orders him to sit down at the kitchen table and – when he does – plonks herself down right on the table top, uncomfortably close to Blaine.

“Alright, Hobbit, you’re gonna tell us right now what the fuck happened between you and Lady Lips on the Big Friendly Giant here’s birthday.”

“I think what Santana’s trying to say,” Elliott says from a normal distance, cringing, “and now I’m questioning why on earth I thought it’d be a good idea to bring her along—”

“You brought me along because I’m exactly the kind of no-holds-barred interrogator you need for this,” Santana says, and then she turns to Blaine and pokes a finger right into his solar plexus. Blaine coughs. “Talk, Anderson.”

“This is ridiculous, Santana,” Blaine says.

“What _happened_?”

Blaine hesitates. “Well, what did Kurt tell you?”

“Oh, he told us that you’ve put your friendship on hold, which sounds like just about the most asinine thing I’ve ever heard,” Santana replies.

“How’s he doing?” he can’t help but ask.

“Blaine,” Elliott says, “he’s miserable. I’ve never seen him like this before. And we’re worried”—“I’m not _worried_ ,” Santana scoffs—“Sure, Santana. Look, we just wanted to see if we can help you guys work things out.”

“Now, out with it!” Santana tacks on. Elliott sighs and shakes his head.

“If Kurt didn’t give you any details I don’t think I should,” Blaine says resolutely.

“Oh my god, how bad could it be?” Santana demands. “Did he destroy one of your bowties? Listen, Hobbit, I’m not leaving until you tell us, so I hope you have decent food.”

“Fine!” Blaine says, miffed. “We broke off our friendship because we gave each other orgasms one time, and then we almost did it again at your birthday. And you just—you can’t be friends and do that without fucking everything up so we decided we need some time apart to get rid of the sexual tension so we can be friends in the future. And so maybe things aren't great but it’s better than damaging our friendship irreparably.”

There's a long, shocked pause from both of them at this burst of information. Then Santana scoffs. “Let me get this straight,” she says. “You two idiots are too idiotic to see how much you freaking obviously love each other that you’re just gonna stop being friends?”

Blaine stands up and takes a few steps away from them before he turns back, a panicky feeling settling in the vicinity of his stomach. “It – it’s not like that. I love Kurt but not like that. And he doesn’t love me like that.”

Elliott and Santana exchange a look.

“Blaine,” Elliott says gently, “I can’t speak for either one of you here, obviously. But I think you should know that Kurt seems pretty hung up on you. He isn’t just sad. He’s moping around like you guys were dating and broke up; that’s not really normal friend behaviour, and it’s been a while since my birthday.”

“He hasn’t cooked a meal for the potluck since,” Santana says.

Blaine shakes his head, trying not to consider the significance of that last thing. “Look, guys, I get that you’re trying to help but you’re really not. We just need to do this and maybe things will get back to normal eventually. I hope so.”

Elliott frowns in a sad sort of way. “Okay, Blaine. Sorry to bother you. Come on, Santana.”

Santana sneers “idiot” at him as she goes but she does leave.

Blaine’s hands start shaking as soon as he closes the door behind them.

Is he in love with Kurt? Has he just been oblivious to it?

The thought sends a spiral of fear and nerves through him.

-

The very next day, Blaine is in a rush trying to get from NYADA to his shift at the coffee shop. He is already going to be late because he has yet to learn how to fly above the sky scrapers to avoid pedestrians and potential train stoppages and slowdowns.

He ducks around a group of people meandering at the front doors (so annoying) and then takes a sharp left to head toward the train when he collides directly into somebody, so hard that he lands _on top_ of them.

He is sprawled out on top of Kurt Hummel.

He pushes himself frantically up on to his hands and knees and stares down at Kurt who looks about as shocked as Blaine feels.

  
  


“…Hi,” Blaine says, breathless.

“Hi,” Kurt says, and he’s just as short of breath. From the fall, perhaps?

“I’m sorry, I wasn’t paying—”

“No no, not your fault, I wasn’t either,” Kurt says quickly.

“Oh my god,” Blaine says, realizing suddenly that he’s still almost-straddling Kurt, scrambling to his feet.

He bends and holds out his hand to help Kurt up. Kurt grabs it, and Blaine tugs Kurt to his feet. In an instant, Kurt’s right there in front of him, and as they lock eyes Blaine finds himself observing that they are such a unique color, and it occurs to Blaine that he’s noticed that before.

But it’s different this time.

Kurt’s something to behold, and not just physically – Kurt is the crescendo of an orchestral piece and the first bite of a cheese soufflé. He’s the center of Blaine’s universe, and how on earth has Blaine never realized? How has it taken so long for him to figure it out?

They’re staring into each other’s eyes, and then, god, then they’re kissing.

“Kurt,” Blaine gasps after only a moment, pulling away quickly. “Kurt, please. Please tell me you want more than friendship, or friendship and something else, but please. Please not just friends.”

Kurt’s shaking his head wildly. “Oh, we’re so much more than friends,” he says, holding Blaine’s face in his palms. “Blaine, I’ve been so stupid and unaware, and then I think I knew after all but I was just scared and—”

“Me too,” Blaine assures him.

Kurt sighs as their noses brush. “Please let’s never be friends again,” he says.

Blaine laughs so hard he has to lean his weight on Kurt. “Oh my god, I love you so much.”

“I love you, too,” Kurt says tearfully. “Thank goodness we bumped into each other.”

-

Blaine takes Kurt’s black turtleneck off, kisses that lovely exposed throat. He pushes Kurt’s undershirt off over his head and inhales the scent of Kurt’s bare skin. “You smell like heaven, Kurt,” he whispers, and Kurt yanks him back up for more kissing. Blaine travels back down once they’ve gotten their fill (for now) until he’s got his mouth around Kurt’s nipple, teeth a gentle graze that has Kurt arching his body towards Blaine’s mouth.

“Yes,” Kurt gasps. “Oh yes, Blaine!”

Blaine breathes out a laugh and then pushes himself further down the bed so he can lick into Kurt’s navel and around it. Kurt cries out, panting below him, hands fisted in Blaine’s jacket – jesus, he still has his jacket on.

He pulls back just long enough to yank that off and throw it on to his bedroom floor before he’s back and unhooking the button on Kurt’s very tight, maroon skinny jeans. He unzips and Kurt keens in his throat, closes his hand around Blaine’s shoulder. Kurt cries out as Blaine tugs the elastic of Kurt’s briefs down to expose his long, hard cock.

“Oh Kurt, jesus,” he groans. “I need you in my mouth.”

“Please!” Kurt gasps.

Blaine peels Kurt’s pants and underwear down and off. Kurt nude is a work of art, a sculpted man with strong, thick biceps and broad shoulders, and abs that Blaine didn’t even know he had. Then there’s the cock nestled in neatly trimmed pubic hair that Blaine has to bury his head down into to smell, nearly comes as his hips push down into the bed, his own cock weeping in sympathy.

He hasn’t even had a proper look at Kurt’s back and ass yet. He’s so lucky.

And then he pushes at Kurt’s hips, “up, up by the headboard,” he urges, and Kurt pushes himself up until he’s resting against it.

“Blaine, you need to be naked,” he pleads, gesturing.

Blaine is still fully clothed.

He pulls the shirt off over his head, twists himself around on to his back to yank off the pants and underwear. Then he crawls over on his hands and knees, eyes glued to Kurt’s as he fits his hands on either side of Kurt’s hips. He kisses Kurt. Eventually, he leans down to suck Kurt’s earlobe into mouth, to lick around the shell.

“Oh, please, baby, please suck me,” Kurt gasps.

Blaine responds to the pet name and Kurt’s prompt by sealing his hand around Kurt’s cock and stroking slowly from root to tip. 

Kurt is trembling. “Please,” he gasps.

Blaine drops down so that he’s sprawled across the bed with his torso raised enough that he can suck Kurt properly. Then, without teasing or warning Blaine drops his mouth down on to Kurt’s cock, ears ringing in his head from arousal as he slides down. He breathes deep and opens his throat so that he’s stuffed full, the head lodged inside so that he can swallow around Kurt.

Kurt thrashes on the bed. “Blaine!” he shouts. Blaine moans, cock throbbing as he pulls back and starts to fuck Kurt’s cock with his mouth, taking Kurt deep, hard, and fast.

The noises Kurt makes – he curses and whimpers and moans, and his hands are balled around chunks of Blaine’s hair. Blaine looks up at Kurt’s face as he takes the entirety of Kurt inside, and Kurt meets his gaze and groans, eyes rolling back. “I c – I can’t even look – look at you Blaine, fuck. Jesus, where the hell d – did you _learn_ —?"

Blaine pulls off to say, “I love giving head.” He kisses the tip of Kurt’s cock, sucks just the head into his mouth and swirls his tongue around it and into the slit where the pre-come is quickly forming. Blaine groans and laps it up, wants every drop, and to get more, he sucks once, twice, says, “You can fuck my mouth if you want.”

And Kurt comes. “Fuck fuck fuck, _Blaine!_ ” Kurt shouts, hips thrusting as he shoots. Blaine swallows around Kurt, groaning and humping the mattress, ready to come from the overload of stimulation.

Kurt sags, gasping for breath like he’s finished one of his Richard Simmons workouts. Blaine licks Kurt clean, and Kurt shivers.

Kurt looks down at him. “ _Blaine_.” It’s barely a word.

“I can’t wait to do that again,” Blaine says, kissing Kurt’s thighs.

Kurt is silent for a moment, staring down at Blaine in apparent disbelief. “Blaine, and I mean this very sincerely: for the rest of our lives, if I ever do or say something stupid just remind me that you can do _that_ with your mouth and so obviously I don’t know what I’m talking about. Damn it, we could have been doing that for a while now if I wasn’t so slow on the uptake.”

Blaine cracks up, burying his face in Kurt’s stomach. “Kurt, you know I’m in the same boat, right?”

Kurt shakes his head and grins. “Now. Blaine. What can _I_ do for _you_?”

Blaine sits up. “Can I ride you?”

“Uh, let me think about that,” Kurt says, placing a mocking finger on his chin. “Get up here. Can I finger you?”

“God, yes,” Blaine croaks.

Once Kurt’s got three fingers rocking into him and one hand on Blaine’s cock, and Kurt’s hard again, Blaine groans and says, impatient, “Okay, okay, please.”

Kurt chuckles. Blaine watches Kurt roll the condom down and pour the lubricant on to his cock and then he clambers into Kurt’s lap. He holds himself suspended as he rubs Kurt’s cock back and forth along his crack and right at his hole before he bears down.

Kurt curses violently, voice pitched low in a way that is intriguing and extremely erotic. Blaine twists himself down on Kurt’s cock until he’s flush with Kurt’s hips. Kurt’s hands are claws on Blaine’s hips as he lays still. “Oh, you don’t have to do that,” Blaine tells him. “I appreciate the restraint but feel free to fuck me as hard as you want.”

“I’m so stupid,” Kurt says mournfully as he pulls Blaine down on to his cock with rough, quick moves. Blaine screws himself down, arching his back as he finds the right angle.

“Oh, oh that’s it, Kurt, right there!” He begins to move frantically, wants Kurt to fuck him so fast and hard that they blur and become one.

Kurt fucks him harder, pulls Blaine’s hips down as he thrusts up. Kurt’s hands are bruising in their grip, and Blaine bends his back even further and meets each thrust. He brings his hand to his cock and starts to strip it in time with Kurt’s thrusts, and it’s the pained-sounding groans from Kurt and the slapping of Kurt’s hips against his ass, combined with the exquisite speed and force, that pushes him over the edge.

Blaine’s jaw drops as he starts to come over himself and Kurt, his body snapping forward and twitching wildly. He grabs hard on to the headboard over Kurt’s head as Kurt fucks him through it. “Oh, oh yeah, Kurt, fuck, yeah,” he grunts, heart hammering so hard he can barely hear himself.

When Blaine recovers, he finds that he’s now lying on his back in bed. Kurt’s already pulled out and taken care of the condom, and now he’s lying beside Blaine, pushing Blaine’s soaking wet hair back.

“You’re so gloriously sweaty, Blaine,” Kurt says, tone one of delight.

“One of my flaws,” Blaine says with a sleepy smile. He yawns.

“Yeah, and you’re also pretty clumsy,” Kurt teases. “You know, you bumped into me the first time we met, too!”

“Uh-uh, you’re remembering that wrong! You bumped into me,” Blaine says, pointing his finger at Kurt. “Made me spill my coffee, remember?”

Kurt laughs. “Well, so we’re both clumsy.” He sobers slightly, cupping Blaine’s jaw. “I’m so glad we found each other.” Then he smirks, adds, “And that the universe has a sense of humour and of the full circle nature of things.”

Blaine laughs and kisses Kurt. “Me too.”

He’s just on the edge of sleep when he sits straight up. “Kurt, I was supposed to go to work.” Kurt’s dozing next to him, completely oblivious to Blaine’s realization.

But he just laughs with joy and lies back down to curl himself around Kurt.

His not-friend.

~*~

“A toast,” Cooper says from across the table while lifting his glass, “to Blaine and Kurt, for finally realizing last year what we’ve all been waiting for!” Everyone cheers and clinks their glasses as Kurt and Blaine exchange a bashful but proud look, and Cooper continues, “and to their new apartment and life together!”

Cheers and clinks ring out around the room once more. It’s pure luck that Cooper happened to be in town for their housewarming party but Blaine’s delighted that his brother could actually make it, along with all of their friends here in New York.

And then, because he’s Cooper, he says with a wink, “And to their impending marriage, am I right?”

A few people clink glasses again with more hollers – Santana, surprisingly, and Rachel and Dani and Artie – but Kurt says, “Hey, let’s not get carried away here. We’re not getting married, everybody! We’re perfectly happy as we are.”

There are a few good-natured groans but everyone seems to accept this statement from Kurt.

In fact, Blaine seems to be the only one having trouble with it. He cannot stop thinking about what Kurt said. His thoughts cling to Kurt’s words throughout dinner and after-drinks and karaoke, and he just can’t shake the feeling of _wrong_ in his system.

Once all of their guests have left, Elliott and his boyfriend traipsing out into the New York night shortly past midnight, Kurt turns to Blaine with a sunny smile. “What a lovely evening! I think that was a real – Blaine? What’s wrong?”

Kurt’s looking at Blaine in the entrance way with such concern from his spot by the door.

Blaine shakes his heads feebly. “I’m fine.”

Kurt shakes his head in an exasperated but fond sort of way and leads Blaine by the hand over to the couch in the living room. They sit, and Kurt holds one of Blaine’s hands in both of his, stroking it gently. “I’m here to listen, Blaine,” Kurt reminds him.

A sudden lump forms in Blaine’s throat as he looks at this man he loves so much – a man who shows him regularly that he is welcome to speak his mind. He clears his throat and gives voice to his thoughts.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said tonight, when Cooper brought up marriage. You said we aren’t getting married, that we’re perfect the way we are. But you want to get married, don’t you?”

Kurt smiles. “All I want is to be with you, Blaine,” he says, placing a heart-achingly sweet kiss in the palm of Blaine’s hand.

“You didn’t really answer my question, sweetie,” Blaine says gently. “I know you want to get married.”

Kurt shrugs. “But you don’t, and that’s okay.”

“Well… Maybe I do.” Blaine’s heart is pulsing, feels like it’s going to burst from nerves.

Kurt pulls his hands away. Blaine tries to grab at them but Kurt keeps his distance. “Blaine,” he says, clearly a little agitated, “come on. I do not want you to even think about marrying me because you think it’ll make me happy or because you think I’ll leave you to marry someone else. You’re the one for me, Blaine, and I don’t need a wedding to prove that.”

“You’ve got it all wrong, Kurt,” Blaine tells him, and in the next breath he’s sliding off the couch and on to his knees to place his hands on Kurt’s thighs. “It might have taken us some time to get up to speed, to realize how much we mean to each other, but I haven’t looked back since. I am never going to love anyone the way I love you. And I know now that I don’t have to be wary of marriage anymore, like I was before. I’m not my parents – _we_ will not be my parents.” Blaine bites his lip and looks up at his lover’s beautiful face. “And all I want to do… is spend my life loving you.”

Kurt’s crying, tears rolling down his cheeks. “Blaine, are – are you sure?” he chokes out, eyes wide and cheeks flushed.

Blaine takes Kurt’s hands now, tears forming in his eyes as he says in reply, “Kurt Hummel, my amazing friend, my one true love, will you marry me?” When Kurt just nods with a breathy, “yeah, yes,” Blaine mimes sliding a ring on to Kurt’s ring finger and places a gentle kiss in the spot where the ring would be if he’d planned this out.

Kurt kisses him, and Blaine melts into it.

Sometime later, and Blaine has no idea how much time has passed, Kurt pulls away enough to sing, in his crisp, beautiful voice, “ _I will love you until the end of time…_ ”

Blaine just cries, and _cries_ , and as Kurt pulls Blaine to his feet with a soft, “Come on. Let’s tell everyone the good news,” Blaine counts himself so very lucky that he’s found Kurt in this lifetime.

**Author's Note:**

> Sebastian serenaded Blaine with I'm A Loser by The Beatles. And of course, Kurt sings a small part of Come What May from _Moulin Rouge_.
> 
> Thank you for reading! Feedback is welcome and appreciated either here or at the post on [tumblr](http://rockinhamburger.tumblr.com/post/122167725408/kbl-reversebang-kurtsieangel-rockinhamburger).
> 
> And please take a moment to send love to [kurtsieangel](http://kurtsieangel.tumblr.com) for her wonderful art!


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